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Old 10-21-2005, 10:18 PM   #1 (permalink)
isfckingdead
 
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Default offensive jokes *giggles*

what is the difference between acne and a catholic priest?

Acne usually comes on a boys face after he turns 12





How did Helen Keller lose her virginity?

Her dad accidentally left the plunger in the toilet.




What do you get when you put a baby on a meathook?

An erection.




What do you say to a woman with two black eyes?

Nothing. You already told that bitch twice.




Why does Stevie Wonder Always Smile

Because He Doesnt Know Hes Black



Why do women fake orgasms?

They think we care.



okay i know these are mean and racist but i find them funny but dont seriously think any of these are right...except the funniest one which will be found at the bottom of this post.















WOMENS RIGHTS!




so fucking funny.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by METALLICA89 View Post
Ive seen you on muiltipul forums saying Metallica and slayer are the worst **** you kid go suck your **** while you listen to your ****ing emo **** I bet you do listen to emo music
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Old 10-21-2005, 10:23 PM   #2 (permalink)
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The Micheal Jackson joke are so old but whatever. I'm bored...

1.What do Micheal Jackson and McDonalds have in common?
They both have their meat slapped between 10 year old buns.

2.What do Micheal Jackson and a playstation have in common?
They are both made of plastic and both get turned on by children

3.What sound does a dying pig make?
Officer down!

...Those are the only jokes I know...
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Old 10-21-2005, 11:33 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Kay these are mean...

A little girl is playing in a sandbox and a cat comes and takes a shit. Why?


Cause it thinks its a litter box.


What does a black person use as identity?

A piece of shit


3 black people jump off a cliff,who survives?



Who the hell cares!







Aww meanness haha
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Old 10-24-2005, 01:09 AM   #4 (permalink)
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A young black woman goes to social services to file for welfare to support her 7 kids. The social worker asks what the kids' names are and the black woman replies, simply, "George.". The social worker, then, asks how she can tell her children apart if they all share the same 1st name. The black woman replies, "Oh, that's easy. I just call them by their last names." i heard this from a grandma. naughty.
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Old 10-24-2005, 02:08 AM   #5 (permalink)
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hehe not even naughty.... cuuute
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Old 10-24-2005, 09:21 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Two Islamic men are sitting on the train. One pulls out a picture and says "This is my first born son. He is a martyr". The second one pulls out a picture and says "This is my first born song. He is also a martyr". The first one then says "Boy, they sure do blow up fast these days"
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Old 10-24-2005, 09:34 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Two men are out drinking one night when they decide that they're going to have a little contest. Both will go their seperate ways, go to as many bars as they can, get as drunk as they can and then meet up the next day to compare notes and see who had succeeded in getting the most drunk.

So the next day they meet again in the pub.

Man 1: "Last night I went to all of the bars in the town centre and had a triple vodka in each one. When I finally made it into my house I was so drunk that I blew chunks on the kitchen floor and then passed out."

Man 2: "That's nothing. Last night I went to all of the bars by the train station, at each one I had a triple whiskey. By the time I got home I was so drunk that I fell onto the fence and broke it. I fell into the pond, threw up over the car, shouted at my neighbours until eventually somebody called the police who came and locked me up overnight. They let me out this morning. I must got much more drunk than you."

Man 1: "You don't understand. 'Chunks' is the name of my dog."
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Old 10-24-2005, 10:00 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Who the **** is Helen Keller?
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Old 10-24-2005, 10:04 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fal
Who the **** is Helen Keller?
Helen Keller was a woman who was (is she still alive?) deaf, dumb and blind. Not usually a fortunate combination. In Helen's case however, she somehow used her experiences to increase awareness of the plight of the disabled in society. I'm not sure how she did it - I just remember reading a picture encylopaedia page about her when I was about 8.
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Old 10-24-2005, 11:26 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Q: What's the best thing about an Ethiopian blowjob?
A: You know she'll swallow!

Q: Do you know what a Jewish dilemma is?
A: Free ham.

Q: Why are there so many homes for battered women?
A: Because they just don't fucking listen!!

Q: Why do Canadians only have sex doggie style?
A: So they can both watch the hockey game!

Q: What have the England football team and a 3-pin plug got in common?
A: They're both fucking useless in Europe.

In early July, Canada celebrates Canada Day, the United States celebrates Independence Day, and in England they celebrate "Boy Did We Get Our Asses Handed To Us, Aren't We A Great Bunch of Poofs" Day. I'm just kidding. That's every day in Jolly Olde England.


Q: What's the difference between a Mercedes and Princess Diana?
A: A Mercedes will easily reach 40.
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