The Official Joke Thread

ElephantSack · 03-28-2009, 01:28 AM

How did the farmer win an award?

He was out standing in his field.

Antonio · 03-28-2009, 01:39 AM

a baby seal walked into a club

ag ag ag!

ElephantSack · 03-28-2009, 02:02 AM

A little boy stumbles into his parents bedroom to find his his mother ****ing a strange man.

Just then his father comes home, and the mother shoves the boy and the man in the closet.

"Sure is dark in here.", the little boy says.
"Yep. Sure is.", says the man.

"I have a baseball.", adds the little boy.
"That's nice, kid.", says the man.

"I'll give it to you for $50.00." the boy said.
"Go to Hell, kid." said the man.

"My Dad owns 3 guns."

"Alright, fine! Here's the 50 bucks"

The nest week, the boy walks into his parents room again and finds his mother with the same man.

Just like before, the father's truck pulls up and they are shuffled into the closet again.

"Sure is dark in here.", says the boy.
"Yep.", says the man.
"I have a baseball glove.", the boy said.
"Alright, how much, ya little ****?", said the man.
"$100"

The nest weekend, the boy's dad asks him if he wants to play some catch. The boy explains that he can't because he sold his ball and mit to a friend.

"For how much?!" says the father.
"$150.", says the boy.
"Boy! You should know better than to hustle your friends! I'm taking you to church right now, so you can repent for your sins!", shouted his father.

So they go to the closest church, and the father throws him in a confessional booth.

"Sure is dark in here.", says the boy.

"Don't start with that **** again.", says the priest.

Antonio · 03-28-2009, 02:05 AM

the post above me is win

Surell · 03-28-2009, 02:09 AM

Why wasn't the priest molesting the kid?

SydMM · 03-28-2009, 05:44 PM

A girl and her mom are walking through the park when they see two people havin' sex and the girl asks her mom what they were doing. The mom says baking a cake. So the next day the girl goes to her mom and tells her she saw her and dad baking a cake. The mom asked her how she knew and the girl said that she licked the icing off the couch.

FaSho · 03-28-2009, 06:01 PM

What does a penguin drink out of?

A Waddle Bawddle! XDDDD

Alfred · 03-28-2009, 07:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Surell

Why wasn't the priest molesting the kid?

Because he was too busy molesting the other choir boys!

333 · 03-28-2009, 07:08 PM

What do you call a fish with no eyes?

A fsh.

Buhaha.

Surell · 03-28-2009, 07:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alfred

Because he was too busy molesting the other choir boys!

Ahh, he was all sleepy and shit. I understand.

03-28-2009, 05:44 PM	#46 (permalink)
SydMM Music Addict Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: South Carolina Posts: 35	A girl and her mom are walking through the park when they see two people havin' sex and the girl asks her mom what they were doing. The mom says baking a cake. So the next day the girl goes to her mom and tells her she saw her and dad baking a cake. The mom asked her how she knew and the girl said that she licked the icing off the couch. __________________

03-28-2009, 01:28 AM	#41 (permalink)
ElephantSack Man vs. Wild Turkey Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: ATX Posts: 948	How did the farmer win an award? He was out standing in his field.

03-28-2009, 02:02 AM	#43 (permalink)
ElephantSack Man vs. Wild Turkey Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: ATX Posts: 948	A little boy stumbles into his parents bedroom to find his his mother **ing a strange man. Just then his father comes home, and the mother shoves the boy and the man in the closet. "Sure is dark in here.", the little boy says. "Yep. Sure is.", says the man. "I have a baseball.", adds the little boy. "That's nice, kid.", says the man. "I'll give it to you for $50.00." the boy said. "Go to Hell, kid." said the man. "My Dad owns 3 guns." "Alright, fine! Here's the 50 bucks" The nest week, the boy walks into his parents room again and finds his mother with the same man. Just like before, the father's truck pulls up and they are shuffled into the closet again. "Sure is dark in here.", says the boy. "Yep.", says the man. "I have a baseball glove.", the boy said. "Alright, how much, ya little ?", said the man. "$100" The nest weekend, the boy's dad asks him if he wants to play some catch. The boy explains that he can't because he sold his ball and mit to a friend. "For how much?!" says the father. "$150.", says the boy. "Boy! You should know better than to hustle your friends! I'm taking you to church right now, so you can repent for your sins!", shouted his father. So they go to the closest church, and the father throws him in a confessional booth. "Sure is dark in here.", says the boy. "Don't start with that ** again.", says the priest.

03-28-2009, 07:08 PM	#49 (permalink)
333 Music Addict Join Date: Mar 2009 Posts: 965	What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. Buhaha.