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Old 05-27-2006, 05:03 AM  
Crowe
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Default "Holy Man"


In Regard to the Holy Man of the Holy Land and his Recent Departure

My brothers well we journey to the Holy Land,
And our only stop will be to see a Holy Man,
He will tell us things you won't understand.
Why we wear smiles on our faces and,
Why we laugh so everyone can hear us and,
Why the only joke we get is our own beliefs.
Carry on my brothers turn on your mothers.
Tell your fathers it's their love that smothers.
Why, oh why, does this Holy Man wear white?
It's these stains that show us divine right.
Our mistakes are the filter for good,
These actions are acts in futility,
He tells us that in the end, we all add to the earth's Fertility.

Holy Man don't tell us no lies,
He sits us down and we look at the sky,
No this Holy Man don't tell us no lies,
He pulls our hearts and liberates our eyes.


This Holy Man with a venerable beard,
Tells us the truths of the things we have feared.
Now I'm not sure where you grew up,
What you were told to do and how to live,
But this Holy Man holds the secrets in his,
Endless robe that flows and flows in endless droves.
Everytime he moves a secret slips through the slits,
And we learn more with every breath he takes.
He points at us, this aged man and his,
Joints crack, and while he winces he lets us know,
That his pain is not for nought and we ought to,
Be glad that he can even move his lips,
To tell us the err of our ways and before he goes,
He must teach us how to live the rest of our days.

Chorus


Oh Holy Man don't go,
There is so much more I need to know!
Oh Holy Man don't go,
Oh Holy Man don't go,
Oh Holy man don't go.
Oh Holy Man...
You're gone.

Ryan Crowe
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Old 05-27-2006, 02:53 PM  
sleepy jack
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I have nothing really to say to like, improve it but, greattt job.
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Old 05-27-2006, 03:43 PM  
Real_Eyez_C_Real_Lies
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holy sh*t mane, i like this. Do you just write for a hobby/something to do, or are you looking to go big with this? j/w
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Old 05-28-2006, 04:11 PM  
Crowe
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Well. I want to do something with it, really. I have started my own singer/songwriter thing to the point where, I have a load of songs I've written. But I have to put them to music.
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Old 05-30-2006, 04:56 PM  
creepinson
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lyrically its good, but im not sure of the feel, in the chorus in particular... it seems a bit... hmmmmm i guess the closest i can get to what im thinking is twangy. It just seems like your sacrificing a bit of lyrical edge for catchiness andsomething which i would never expect from master crowe...EASY RHYMING?!?!

whatever... i think the verses are rediculously good, but i would have to hear the chorus to really understand what your plans were for it

oh and if you got around to criting those atrium songs i would be really appreciative
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Old 05-30-2006, 06:13 PM  
Crowe
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oh jeez creep sorry, totally slipped my mind.. gettin to it now.
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