A Poem (album, Kiss, member, quote)

**sleepy jack** · 08-25-2008, 05:56 PM

We're riding comets overlooking burning islands
When we kiss its like a ferris wheel spinning,
There are more stars than eyes in bars
And we're drunk on dreams,
Writing letters on roses and things.
I only shine when I'm wrapped up in silence,
You see I've been dyeing my hair
I've been growing out my fingernails,
In hopes I can scratch your name
On every blackboard I see,
And you'll remember me
As your ears are slowly falling off,
I'm the Hiroshima of lovers.
So never forget me when you're
Playing the White Album backwards,
You're manipulative, you're witty,
But the sex makes you dumb.
So please remember me when
You're listening to Dark Side of the Moon,
And walking down a Yellow Brick Road,
Then forget me when you watch
The Land of Oz Explode.

Wifey Boozer · 08-25-2008, 08:09 PM

Hell yes. Hell yes.

Quote:

Originally Posted by SleepyJack

There are more stars than eyes in bars
And we're drunk on dreams,
Writing letters to roses and things.

My favorite three lines in the whole poem. Though, I think it should be "writing letters on roses and things". It just illustrates a love of insanity, and seems to fit the poem. (It's about a girl, right? Just kidding.) The references in this make it all the more poetic, yet it's not overly-trying to be "deep", it just exists in it's beauty of wisdom and experience. I love the way you did that.

**sleepy jack** · 08-25-2008, 09:59 PM

Hey thanks, I fixed that. I don't really know what its about aside from one or two lines.

Wifey Boozer · 08-25-2008, 10:03 PM

You're welcome. What are the one or two lines where you know where it means? What does it mean? Everyone who writes well like this writes everything for a reason, it all must mean something.

**sleepy jack** · 08-25-2008, 10:08 PM

"I only shine when I'm wrapped up in silence" is just about being shy. "You're manipulative, you're witty / But the sex makes you dumb." Is about someone I knew and they're a very clever and intelligent person but the people they choose to fall for make me lose respect for them. Most of it just came out other then those two lines which were more intentional because I actually had a thought to the meaning behind them.

Wifey Boozer · 08-25-2008, 10:13 PM

The line about the manipulative person was my second favorite in the poem. Because it sounds real, y'know? It's real because it was real to you, you wrote it for an concious reason. The rest is beautiful, it probably does have meaning (like I said, every good thing like this has meaning somewhere to the author), but it's unconcious. There's reasons why people pick the words they do, and feel confident enough to put them on paper. Good job, even if you're unconcious to it ;].

Whatsitoosit · 08-27-2008, 02:04 PM

I like this one. It's not too much and it's not overly basic... good job.

Folkie · 08-31-2008, 10:33 AM

wow thats really good i only wish i could write something like that

Wifey Boozer · 08-31-2008, 10:52 AM

^Bluesmen say they sell their souls to play the blues. They sell their souls for the pain, so the music has soul.
Writer's write the blues.

"Do you have soul?"
"Yeh, back aisle, next to the blues."

wolverinewolfweiselpigeon · 09-08-2008, 02:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sleepy jack

"I only shine when I'm wrapped up in silence" is just about being shy. "You're manipulative, you're witty / But the sex makes you dumb." Is about someone I knew and they're a very clever and intelligent person but the people they choose to fall for make me lose respect for them. Most of it just came out other then those two lines which were more intentional because I actually had a thought to the meaning behind them.

Amazing.

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08-25-2008, 05:56 PM
sleepy jack thom yorke disciple Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 17,807	A Poem We're riding comets overlooking burning islands When we kiss its like a ferris wheel spinning, There are more stars than eyes in bars And we're drunk on dreams, Writing letters on roses and things. I only shine when I'm wrapped up in silence, You see I've been dyeing my hair I've been growing out my fingernails, In hopes I can scratch your name On every blackboard I see, And you'll remember me As your ears are slowly falling off, I'm the Hiroshima of lovers. So never forget me when you're Playing the White Album backwards, You're manipulative, you're witty, But the sex makes you dumb. So please remember me when You're listening to Dark Side of the Moon, And walking down a Yellow Brick Road, Then forget me when you watch The Land of Oz Explode. __________________ I sit in my house for days on end and stare at the roses in the closet.

08-25-2008, 09:59 PM
sleepy jack thom yorke disciple Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 17,807	Hey thanks, I fixed that. I don't really know what its about aside from one or two lines. __________________ I sit in my house for days on end and stare at the roses in the closet.

08-25-2008, 10:03 PM
Wifey Boozer Prime Minister of Spain Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: Troy side'ah the dirt, NY Posts: 274	You're welcome. What are the one or two lines where you know where it means? What does it mean? Everyone who writes well like this writes everything for a reason, it all must mean something. __________________ Circa Le Vintage: I love you. Circa Le Vintage: You pretentious bastard. Circa Le Vintage: <3 deadreligionggjb: I love you too. You pretentious cunt. deadreligionggjb: <3 Everybody knows I'm not a folk-singer.

08-25-2008, 10:08 PM
sleepy jack thom yorke disciple Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 17,807	"I only shine when I'm wrapped up in silence" is just about being shy. "You're manipulative, you're witty / But the sex makes you dumb." Is about someone I knew and they're a very clever and intelligent person but the people they choose to fall for make me lose respect for them. Most of it just came out other then those two lines which were more intentional because I actually had a thought to the meaning behind them. __________________ I sit in my house for days on end and stare at the roses in the closet.

08-25-2008, 10:13 PM
Wifey Boozer Prime Minister of Spain Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: Troy side'ah the dirt, NY Posts: 274	The line about the manipulative person was my second favorite in the poem. Because it sounds real, y'know? It's real because it was real to you, you wrote it for an concious reason. The rest is beautiful, it probably does have meaning (like I said, every good thing like this has meaning somewhere to the author), but it's unconcious. There's reasons why people pick the words they do, and feel confident enough to put them on paper. Good job, even if you're unconcious to it ;]. __________________ Circa Le Vintage: I love you. Circa Le Vintage: You pretentious bastard. Circa Le Vintage: <3 deadreligionggjb: I love you too. You pretentious cunt. deadreligionggjb: <3 Everybody knows I'm not a folk-singer.

08-27-2008, 02:04 PM
Whatsitoosit Bringer of Carrots Join Date: May 2008 Location: New York, NY Posts: 454	I like this one. It's not too much and it's not overly basic... good job. __________________ "It takes 43 muscles to frown and 17 to smile, but it doesn't take any to just sit there with a dumb look on your face."

08-31-2008, 10:33 AM
Folkie Groupie Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: Kingston, On Posts: 35	wow thats really good i only wish i could write something like that

08-31-2008, 10:52 AM
Wifey Boozer Prime Minister of Spain Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: Troy side'ah the dirt, NY Posts: 274	^Bluesmen say they sell their souls to play the blues. They sell their souls for the pain, so the music has soul. Writer's write the blues. "Do you have soul?" "Yeh, back aisle, next to the blues." __________________ Circa Le Vintage: I love you. Circa Le Vintage: You pretentious bastard. Circa Le Vintage: <3 deadreligionggjb: I love you too. You pretentious cunt. deadreligionggjb: <3 Everybody knows I'm not a folk-singer.