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Old 08-05-2014, 04:30 PM   #21 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Black Francis View Post
thnx. that specific part is about hiding your bad side under a smile, in my case hiding my depression from the girl i was seeing at the time.
Yeah that's what I thought it was about. And that really fits to me and what I do atm as well!
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Old 08-31-2014, 12:12 PM   #22 (permalink)
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"Passing by"

I see a familiar face passing by
Surely on his way to have a good time
We spot each other and briefly say hi
And then he asks me: "What are you doing tonight?"

i know he is going to invite me somewhere
Probably to wherever he was heading
To some party to get hammered
To some concert to get wasted

I quickly make up an excuse to blow him off
Because i've already traveled down that road
The road of alcohol and drugs
Of meaningless lays and forgettable fun

He shrugs off my excuse and carries on
And i am left wondering why i blew him off
So i could do what? watch tv home alone?
when did that turn into my definition of fun?

I quickly changed my mind and decide to take his offer
But when i turned around i noticed he was gone
And now i regret the path i chose
And alone i watch life passing me by.
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Last edited by Black Francis; 09-08-2014 at 11:44 AM.
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Old 09-07-2014, 05:55 PM   #23 (permalink)
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Thats deep bro... Keep up the good work!
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Old 09-29-2014, 10:26 AM   #24 (permalink)
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"Different"

It is true you and i are different
We do not have the same outlook on life
We do not have the same habits or speak alike
And we do not have the same wishes

But here we are in this moment in time
Meeting at the same crossroad in life
Equal in our frailty and doubt
Simply hoping to figure things out

In this feeling you are my brother
In this struggle you are my sister
Your pain reflects mine
And this empathy is our wisdom

Until this very moment
You were a stranger to me
Another one in the crowd i did not see
A passing glance i did not perceive

But in this moment of vulnerability
Polar opposites meet
As if life is trying to reflect us
We are not as different as we think

Individuality aside
You and i have the same life
United or divided we stand
Not so different after all.
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Old 03-09-2015, 11:28 PM   #25 (permalink)
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"Say anything"

It is always cold around you
You don't say anything anymore
Is all now mean looks and shrugs
At my attempts to feel your warmth

My desolated lover
Your skin is cold to the touch
You get my love by default
But my heart lies elsewhere

We have no one to fool
We have no obligation
We have only appreciation
For the ruse of our love

But jaded and unfulfilled
The void between us surely builds
Drowning our voices without remorse
Plotting in silence its true intention.

So say anything, now
Before your voice fades out
Before our hearts don't care to bother
And all we are is former lovers.
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Old 03-09-2015, 11:31 PM   #26 (permalink)
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That last entry 'Say anything' i made for a forum poetry contest so i welcome any critiques to make it better.

but like i mentioned in the OP, plz be constructive about your critiques only then will i listen.
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Old 03-17-2015, 10:47 PM   #27 (permalink)
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'Firelily'

This moonlight serenade
Is playing our song
Pulling the strings from above
Making us dance like puppets

Filled with love but no promise
Avoiding becoming too real
For it matters not what we feel
What matters is what will come of it

We can be happy in this dream
But we cannot live in it forever
For as our hearts come together
Our bodies will feel the need

To make this fantasy a reality
To touch what words cannot reach
To express all our devotion
In a true heartfelt kiss.

Lily of fire
Your heart to me is pristine
You embody all my desires
And have me living a dream
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Old 05-10-2015, 11:02 AM   #28 (permalink)
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"Empty Halls"

My soul is trapped in these walls
confined to a life long gone
To the promise of eternal love
To the laughter that echoed in these halls

This was to be the perfect home
Our sanctuary above the world
We placed all our hopes in this foundation
But could not reach our own expectations

For even love lies
And allows emotion to fill his eyes
With promises he cannot keep
That passing time will take for granted

But all we hope and demanded
Is still ingrained in these walls
In the place we once called our home
Where all my hope still lay cemented
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Old 06-28-2015, 11:29 AM   #29 (permalink)
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I will leave you intact
It will all be my fault
For i loved you whole heartily
But i do not know love


Love this part especially. Good job, it is hard for me to do longer pieces personally
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Old 06-28-2015, 11:39 AM   #30 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Golden Lights View Post
I will leave you intact
It will all be my fault
For i loved you whole heartily
But i do not know love


Love this part especially. Good job, it is hard for me to do longer pieces personally
Thnx

I don't write long poems either, ideally i want to share its message in just a few memorable lines.
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