You want my advice here it is.
1. You're not going to be taken seriously unless you get to 1,000 posts and not spamming. I.e. give them a reason to care about you enough to review your works.
Are you someone whose personality we've come to know? None of this should really matter, but on Musicbanter, we don't like newbies coming here and demanding all our time. That may not be how you see it, but thats how they see it.
2. Write more, post writing less. Write a piece, leave it for three days, really wrestle with the intricate. The cliches are there because you're skipping over real feeling to get to some other point.
3. This goes for everyone. Look at your piece and the part you love the most. Not like, not are proud of, I mean ****ing love. Take that part out.
Generally those pieces are too personal to make any god damned sense to readers. If you're writing for yourself, go crazy. If you're posting it, get it out.
I'm thinking of the one guy who wrote "I want to fall in love and gently land on my feet." If you want my honest opinion, that line is awful; its cute, its clever, it belongs in an American Idol song. Theres nothing good about it, the line almost says "do you see what I did there? look at me!"
I tend to love quite a few works by Frank O'Hara because he focuses almost entierly on the "who gives a ****" pieces of the day to day. But thats what matters. He never says look at me, he's very matter-of-fact. I'd suggested reading some of his pieces until something clicks.
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