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Old 12-01-2008, 08:42 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Obama's Cabinet

Obama's Cabinet
Economic:

Secretary of the Treasury: Timothy Geithner
Secretary of Commerce: Bill Richardson
Chairwoman, Council of Economic Advisers: Christina Romer
Director, Domestic Policy Council: Melody Barnes; Heather Higginbottom (Deputy Officer)
Director, National Economic Council: Lawrence Summers
Chairman, Economic Recovery Advisory Board: Paul Volcker
Director, Office of Management and Budget: Peter Orszag

National Security:

Secretary of State: Hillary Clinton
Secretary of Defense: Robert Gates
Secretary of Homeland Security: Janet Napolitano
National Security Advisor: General Jim Jones
U.S. Ambassador to the United Nations: Susan Rice
Attorney General: Eric Holder

Other:
Secretary of Health and Human Services: Tom Daschle
U.S. Trade Representative: Xavier Becerra

"Chicago -- President-elect Barack Obama and Vice President-elect Joe Biden officially announced key members of their national security team today: nominating Senator Hillary Clinton as Secretary of State, selecting Defense Secretary Robert Gates to remain as Secretary of Defense, nominating Eric Holder as Attorney General, nominating Arizona Governor Janet Napolitano as Secretary of the Department of Homeland Security, nominating Susan Rice as Ambassador to the United Nations and selecting General Jim Jones, USMC (Ret) as National Security Adviser.

"In this uncertain world, the time has come for a new beginning -- a new dawn of American leadership to overcome the challenges of the 21st century, and to seize the opportunities embedded in those challenges. To succeed, we must pursue a new strategy that skillfully uses, balances, and integrates all elements of American power: our military and diplomacy; our intelligence and law enforcement; our economy and the power of our moral example. The team that we have assembled here today is uniquely suited to do just that. They share my pragmatism about the use of power, and my sense of purpose about America's role as a leader in the world," said President-elect Obama.

"It is an honor to be a part of this team, led by the President-elect -- a team that will see to it that America can lead the world not only by the example of our power, but also by the power of our example. I believe we have assembled a national security team that is poised to recapture the totality of America’s strength," said Vice President-elect Biden.

The national security team members announced today are listed below:

Senator Hillary Clinton, Secretary of State
Over nearly four decades in public service, as an attorney, First Lady, Senator, and presidential candidate, Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton has become one of the nation's foremost champions for children and families and advocates for women's rights and human rights. During the Clinton Administration, she transformed the role of First Lady, fighting for universal health care and helping to lead successful bipartisan efforts to improve the adoption and foster care systems, reduce teen pregnancy, and provide health care to millions of children through the Children’s Health Insurance Program. As a representative of the United States, she championed American interests as well as the rights of women and girls in more than eighty countries around the world. In November 2000, Senator Clinton became the first First Lady elected to public office and the first woman elected independently in New York State; she has since won reelection. In the Senate, she has continued to advocate for equal access to health care, education, and economic opportunity for women and girls around the world. As a member of the Senate Armed Services Committee, Senator Clinton has fought for and secured in law improved health care for members of the National Guard and Reserves and worked to bring our troops home safely and responsibly from Iraq. She also serves as the only Senate member of the Transformation Advisory Group to the Joint Forces Command, working to modernize our military. And Senator Clinton has continued to fight for quality, affordable health care for every American, working to strengthen the Children’s Health Insurance Program and expand the use of health information technology. Most recently, as a groundbreaking candidate for President of the United States, Senator Clinton became the first woman ever to win a presidential primary, receiving more than 18 million votes as an advocate for working families and a voice for millions of Americans who have felt invisible to their government.

Secretary Robert Gates, Secretary of Defense
Dr. Robert M. Gates was sworn in on December 18th, 2006, as the 22nd Secretary of Defense. Before entering his present post, Secretary Gates was the President of Texas A&M University, the nation's seventh largest university. Prior to assuming the presidency of Texas A&M on August 1st, 2002, he served as Interim Dean of the George Bush School of Government and Public Service at Texas A&M from 1999 to 2001. Secretary Gates served as Director of Central Intelligence from 1991 until 1993. Secretary Gates is the only career officer in CIA's history to rise from entry-level employee to Director. He served as Deputy Director of Central Intelligence from 1986 until 1989 and as Assistant to the President and Deputy National Security Adviser at the White House from January 20th, 1989, until November 6th, 1991, for President George H.W. Bush. Secretary Gates has been awarded the National Security Medal, the Presidential Citizens Medal, has twice received the National Intelligence Distinguished Service Medal, and has three times received CIA's highest award, the Distinguished Intelligence Medal. Secretary Gates received his bachelor's degree from the College of William and Mary, his master's degree in history from Indiana University, and his doctorate in Russian and Soviet history from Georgetown University.

Eric Holder, Attorney General
Mr. Holder is a litigation partner at Covington & Burling LLP in Washington, DC. During his professional career, Mr. Holder has held a number of significant positions in government. Upon graduating from Columbia Law School, he moved to Washington, DC and joined the Department of Justice as part of the Attorney General's Honors Program. In 1988, Mr. Holder was nominated by President Reagan to become an Associate Judge of the Superior Court of the District of Columbia. He was confirmed by the Senate and his investiture occurred in October of that year. Over the next five years, Judge Holder presided over hundreds of civil and criminal trials and matters. In 1993, President Clinton nominated Mr. Holder to become the United States Attorney for the District of Columbia. He was confirmed later that year and served as the head of the largest United States Attorneys office in the nation for nearly four years. In 1997, President Clinton appointed Mr. Holder to serve as Deputy Attorney General, the number two position in the United States Department of Justice. He became the first African-American to serve as Deputy Attorney General. Mr. Holder briefly served under President Bush as Acting Attorney General pending the confirmation of Attorney General John Ashcroft. Mr. Holder attended Columbia College, majored in American History, and graduated in 1973. Mr. Holder then attended Columbia Law School from which he graduated in 1976. While in law school, he clerked at the N.A.A.C.P. Legal Defense Fund and the Department of Justice's Criminal Division.

Continued below...
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Ive seen you on muiltipul forums saying Metallica and slayer are the worst **** you kid go suck your **** while you listen to your ****ing emo **** I bet you do listen to emo music

Last edited by sleepy jack; 12-01-2008 at 08:48 PM.
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Old 12-01-2008, 08:42 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Continued...

Governor Janet Napolitano, Secretary of the Department of Homeland Security
Named one of America's Top Five Governors by Time magazine and one of America's top women leaders by Newsweek, Janet Napolitano stands out as a leader in developing innovative solutions to some of our country's greatest challenges. As Governor of Arizona, she's fought for quality schools, affordable healthcare, sensible economic development, a safe homeland, a secure border, and a government that is run efficiently and responsibly. She led the successful effort to create a new grade level in public school by offering voluntary full day kindergarten to every Arizona family. She raised teacher pay, expanded access to health insurance, and saved seniors millions on prescription drugs. Her homeland security background is extensive: as U.S. Attorney for Arizona, Napolitano led the Arizona portion of the domestic terrorism investigation into the Oklahoma City bombing; as Attorney General, she helped write the law to break up human smuggling rings; and as Governor, she implemented the first state homeland security strategy in the nation and opened the first state counter-terrorism center. She is a leader in coordinating federal, state, local and bi-national homeland security efforts, having presided over large-scale disaster preparedness exercises to ensure well-crafted and functional emergency plans. Napolitano was the first governor to call for the National Guard to assist at the U.S. -- Mexico border at federal expense, and is a leading national voice for comprehensive immigration reform. The past chair of the National Governors Association -- the first woman in history to hold this position -- Janet Napolitano was re-elected in 2006 in a landslide victory as Arizona's 21st Governor. Prior to her election as Governor of Arizona, Napolitano served one term as Arizona Attorney General and four years as U.S. Attorney for the District of Arizona.

Susan Rice, Ambassador to the United Nations
Dr. Susan E. Rice served most recently as a Senior Foreign Policy Advisor to the Obama for America campaign while on leave from the Brookings Institution where she is a Senior Fellow in the Foreign Policy and Global Economy and Development Programs. Rice currently serves on the Obama-Biden Transition Project Advisory Board. From 1997-2001, she was U.S. Assistant Secretary of State for African Affairs. Prior to that, Rice served in the White House at the National Security Council as Special Assistant to the President and Senior Director for African Affairs and as Director for International Organizations and Peacekeeping. Rice was previously a management consultant at McKinsey and Company. She received her B.A. in History with Honors from Stanford University and her M.Phil. and D.Phil. (Ph.D.) degrees in International Relations from Oxford University, where she was a Rhodes Scholar.

General Jim Jones, USMC (Ret), National Security Advisor
General Jim Jones, USMC (Ret) is president and chief executive officer of the U.S. Chamber Institute for 21st Century Energy. From July 1999 to January 2003, Jones was the 32nd Commandant of the Marine Corps. After relinquishing command as Commandant, he assumed the positions of Supreme Allied Commander, Europe (SACEUR) and Commander of the United States European Command (COMUSEUCOM), positions he held until December 2006. During this final assignment, he encouraged the North Atlantic Treaty Organization to regard global energy as a security issue and advocated that the alliance consider the defense of critical infrastructures as a 21st century collective security mission. Jones retired from active duty in the U.S. Marine Corps February 1st, 2007, after more than 40 years of service. In addition to having been awarded national and international military awards, Jones received a bachelor of science degree (1966) and an Honorary Doctorate of Letters (2002) from Georgetown University. In June 1985, he graduated from the National War College in Washington, D.C."

Key members of Obama-Biden national security team announced | Change.gov: The Obama-Biden Transition Team
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Ive seen you on muiltipul forums saying Metallica and slayer are the worst **** you kid go suck your **** while you listen to your ****ing emo **** I bet you do listen to emo music

Last edited by sleepy jack; 12-01-2008 at 08:48 PM.
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Old 12-01-2008, 08:51 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Clinton would've been really good for Secretary of Health and Human Services, I'm not too stoked about her being Secretary of State to be perfectly honest. I understand Obama wants to surround himself with people that have different ideas so they can come up with the best solution but Clinton and him differed on that and I really hope that doesn't make any delicate situations even more delicate.

Napolitano was a great great choice though and I'm happy about Holder as well. Jones and Rice were also pretty solid choices. Gates I'm worried about because he's been involved in one of the most corrupt administrations ever but lets hope Obama knows what he's doing. I can definitely see the pros to choosing him.
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Ive seen you on muiltipul forums saying Metallica and slayer are the worst **** you kid go suck your **** while you listen to your ****ing emo **** I bet you do listen to emo music
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Old 12-01-2008, 08:54 PM   #4 (permalink)
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One day you will you regret caring about this...you're one of the smartest people I've never meet, enjoy the trip.
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Old 12-01-2008, 09:37 PM   #5 (permalink)
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The Cabinet: The Freedom Fighters*

I'm going to offer a brief description of what each job is for those of you who fell asleep during your civics class or aren't American. The cabinet is a team of officials picked by the President and approved by the Senate and they're there to serve the President in all his wonderful duties (he does need help, the last president who tried to do it on his own was FDR and the result was paralysis though they've tried to cover that up.) It's grown since the days of Washington (who only had four people) and sadly it's not as cool anymore because instead of a badass Atheist who hated the church as Secretary of State were going to have a boring white woman with boobs. Not to say boobs are bad but they've never been exciting in politics unless you count Taft (hottie!)

Secretary of State: Shakes hand with foreigners and in the past eight years has learned "The President is sorry" in over two thousand languages.

Secretary of Defense: Blows foreigners up and in the past eight years has learned "we're here to take your oil, fucking arab" in over two thousand languages.

Secretary of Treasury: The Fiddy Cent of the White House if you will. Except in his line of business he's more like the Your Money Cent.

Attorney General: Remember in high school when you checked out that book for an essay on Islam and men in black suits showed up at your door? Yeah, he was just curious.

Secretary of Transportation: You know that black guy that drove McCain's bus and that white guy in handcuffs with a collar around his neck who drove Obama's? This is where he ends up.

National Security Adviser: Advises the President on National Security.

Secretary of Health and Human Services: Heartburn, Indigestion, Upset Stomach, Nausea, Diarrhea, Death, high five man. Thanks to all your "warnings" I have to wait an extra thirty seconds per commercial to watch my Reality TV.

Secretary of Agriculture: Honestly I would tell you but you'd just fall asleep.

Secretary of Education: You know how you only have a few dollars in your wallet? This person cuts up those few dollars and tries to keep our children smart on it. This person secretly dreams of killing the Secretary of Defense because he gets a thousand and nine times as much money to spend on a single bullet. Someday the Secretary of Education will get one of those bullets. Someday very very soon.

Secretary of Interior: If everyone dies, he will become President and than the National Park Service will cry even more.

Secretary of Energy: Their job is to hate Al Gore, very very very much.

Secretary of Housing & Urban Development:
The whitest position ever.

Secretary of Veterans Affairs:
You know that crazy drunk guy missing a leg who has no health insurance? This guy feeds on his blood.

Secretary of Labor: Here's a little secret about this position: it's always held by a socialist and that is why they're never invited to cabinet parties because they're commie scum.

Secretary of Commerce: Ironically, he loves the cuban cigars.

Secretary of the Department of Homeland Security: What's the terrorist warning right now? Red? Orange? Green? He accepts your thanks, if we had this on 9/11 you'd remember it as 9/11: the day nothing happened.







*Regulators
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Ive seen you on muiltipul forums saying Metallica and slayer are the worst **** you kid go suck your **** while you listen to your ****ing emo **** I bet you do listen to emo music

Last edited by sleepy jack; 12-01-2008 at 09:55 PM.
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Old 12-01-2008, 09:54 PM   #6 (permalink)
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i herd it lookd lik this:

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Old 12-01-2008, 09:55 PM   #7 (permalink)
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^ That's not even trying

And you're one of my 10 favorite members...for shame.
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Originally Posted by cardboard adolescent View Post
i prefer foreplay. the orgasm is overrated.
If you're posting in the music forums make sure to be thoughtful and expressive, if you're posting in the lounge ask yourself "is this something that adds to the conversation?" It's important to remember that a lot of people use each thread. You're probably not as funny or clever as you think, I know I'm not.

My Van Morrison Discography Thread
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Old 12-02-2008, 09:04 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by JayJamJah View Post
^ That's not even trying

And you're one of my 10 favorite members...for shame.
I smell a new list.
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Old 12-02-2008, 09:10 AM   #9 (permalink)
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This one any better Jay?

More realistic IMO.
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What? No. No. No. No no no.
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Old 12-02-2008, 05:25 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Hilarious, I type out a thought-out and lengthy joke and you guys post pictures of wood and metal. I know what deserves applauding here, good job guys.
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Ive seen you on muiltipul forums saying Metallica and slayer are the worst **** you kid go suck your **** while you listen to your ****ing emo **** I bet you do listen to emo music
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