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Old 11-22-2020, 06:09 PM   #271 (permalink)
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Old 11-22-2020, 06:33 PM   #272 (permalink)
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Just be sure. I think most men give up when their wives get c unty. You gotta be willing to eat a bucket of **** everyday. Not raising your kid together in a peaceful environment shouldn’t be an option. If it ain’t working, if there’s a kid, you make it ****ing work and make sure the kid doesn’t know **** except it’s all good. Being married doesn’t mean ****. Doing what it takes means something. And kids don’t change peoples priorities. People have kids and continue on being the same selfish ****s they were before. I’ve rarely seen anything else. People are so ****ing quick to justify leaving their kids. A man that has these ****ing excuses for not being under the same roof as their kids are ****ing bitches. Especially military ****s going off to some **** war. If you wanna be a soldier don’t have a kid you selfish *******s. Same with drunks and junkies and just all sorts.
Believe me. I would sacrifice anything for my kids. In fact, I'm absolutely against spanking and corporal punishment too. What's best for the kid supercedes what I want. I would never leave my kids and I agree with you, people abandoning them often do so for selfish reasons and it ****s up the kid's life. I hate war, and I despise foreign US intervention - so obviously I have no plans on being a pawn in some pointless foreign military adventure. Nor will I let my vices ruin my ability to parent.

I appreciate your concern though. And I have a feeling you've seen plenty of terrible parents in your personal life - whether that be your own parents or friends of yours who are parents or who had terrible parents.
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Old 11-22-2020, 06:34 PM   #273 (permalink)
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Just be sure. I think most men give up when their wives get c unty. You gotta be willing to eat a bucket of **** everyday. Not raising your kid together in a peaceful environment shouldn’t be an option. If it ain’t working, if there’s a kid, you make it ****ing work and make sure the kid doesn’t know **** except it’s all good. Being married doesn’t mean ****. Doing what it takes means something. And kids don’t change peoples priorities. People have kids and continue on being the same selfish ****s they were before. I’ve rarely seen anything else. People are so ****ing quick to justify leaving their kids. A man that has these ****ing excuses for not being under the same roof as their kids are ****ing bitches. Especially military ****s going off to some **** war. If you wanna be a soldier don’t have a kid you selfish *******s. Same with drunks and junkies and just all sorts.
I believe what you're describing are the resulting symptoms of living in a society that doesn't take care of it's people. There is a definitive link between uneducated women (higher ed) and having 2-5 children starting at a young age, and educated women (BA or beyond) having 0-2 children, later in life, and with greater financial security.

Imagine if we offered comprehensive sex education! Imagine if birth control was not taboo and that girls were not taught to be so disconnected from their bodies. Imagine if we encouraged boys to continue playing with dolls and dressing up and exploring gender roles? It's not a coincidence that little boys who are allowed to play with dolls grow up to be attentive fathers.

Destroy the military industrial complex, destroy the for-profit prison systems, kill the war on drugs and repeal or amend the 13th amendment, and imagine the numbers of black and brown fathers that would have been and wanted to be attentive fathers.

Drunks and junkies? We already know we need further reaching and more comprehensive drug and alcohol treatment options and facilities.

I also think that split and happy households are infinitely better environments for children to grow up in than one where you have two prisoners trapped together pretending that everything's fine.
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Old 11-22-2020, 06:36 PM   #274 (permalink)
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I was a ****ing teacher. Bad parenting was all I saw.

Preciate you not being defensive.

Go breed! Just be ****ing sure.
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Old 11-22-2020, 06:40 PM   #275 (permalink)
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I don't doubt it but when that's all you look for that's all you see.
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Old 11-22-2020, 06:40 PM   #276 (permalink)
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I was a ****ing teacher. Bad parenting was all I saw.

Preciate you not being defensive.

Go breed! Just be ****ing sure.
Why would I be defensive? You're not attacking me personally - obviously you've had some bad experience with parents before. Words of caution never hurt anyone.

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I also think that split and happy households are infinitely better environments for children to grow up in than one where you have two prisoners trapped together pretending that everything's fine.
I agree with Steph here. But I also agree with OH. I think OH meant that spouses often times split over differences that could've been reconciled with some work. There are some instances that are so toxic that all parties would be better off separated. In that case, I would add that both parties bear responsibility and guilt for having bad judgement and having a kid with someone who was not spouse-worthy.

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Old 11-22-2020, 06:46 PM   #277 (permalink)
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I believe what you're describing are the resulting symptoms of living in a society that doesn't take care of it's people. There is a definitive link between uneducated women (higher ed) and having 2-5 children starting at a young age, and educated women (BA or beyond) having 0-2 children, later in life.

Imagine if we offered comprehensive sex education! Imagine if birth control was not taboo and that girls were not taught to be so disconnected from their bodies. Imagine if we encouraged boys to continue playing with dolls and dressing up and exploring gender roles? It's not a coincidence that little boys who are allowed to play with dolls grow up to be attentive fathers.

Destroy the military industrial complex, destroy the for-profit prison systems, kill the war on drugs and repeal or amend the 13th amendment, and imagine the numbers of black and brown fathers that would have been and wanted to be attentive fathers.

Drunks and junkies? We already know we need further reaching and more comprehensive drug and alcohol treatment options and facilities.

I also think that split and happy households are infinitely better environments for children to grow up in than one where you have two prisoners trapped together pretending that everything's fine.
Good post. On the last one though I just think men need to learn that the pussy is going to get stale and the woman is going to get annoying as ****. Almost always. Being a man means figuring it out and making it work. Men quit marriages with kids because of basic **** like the wife steps out for some new dick. Just ignore petty **** like that. You don’t OWN her. If you can’t do it recognize before hand and like I said just don’t have the kid. Christ that’s easy. If you’re going to fight all the time because you’re wife cheats then don’t have a kid. That’s one example. You can’t expect a person to be what you expect lol. People are nuts. That includes whoever you marry.
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Old 11-22-2020, 06:47 PM   #278 (permalink)
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In that case, I would add that both parties bear responsibility and guilt for having bad judgement and having a kid with someone who was not spouse-worthy.
OMG thank you!!!
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Old 11-22-2020, 06:53 PM   #279 (permalink)
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I believe what you're describing are the resulting symptoms of living in a society that doesn't take care of it's people. There is a definitive link between uneducated women (higher ed) and having 2-5 children starting at a young age, and educated women (BA or beyond) having 0-2 children, later in life, and with greater financial security.

Imagine if we offered comprehensive sex education! Imagine if birth control was not taboo and that girls were not taught to be so disconnected from their bodies. Imagine if we encouraged boys to continue playing with dolls and dressing up and exploring gender roles? It's not a coincidence that little boys who are allowed to play with dolls grow up to be attentive fathers.

Destroy the military industrial complex, destroy the for-profit prison systems, kill the war on drugs and repeal or amend the 13th amendment, and imagine the numbers of black and brown fathers that would have been and wanted to be attentive fathers.

Drunks and junkies? We already know we need further reaching and more comprehensive drug and alcohol treatment options and facilities.

I also think that split and happy households are infinitely better environments for children to grow up in than one where you have two prisoners trapped together pretending that everything's fine.
imo... Sex ed only goes so far

It's boojie hubris to think poor people don't know about condoms. We just live reckless. We smoke cigs, drink in excess, do drugs, play the lotto and pump out kids like nobodies business.


Not saying the system is good but the idea that we just lack information is also pie in the sky nonsense.

The war on drugs is wrong, sure. Guess what? You could end it tomorrow and we'd still have the number 1 spot in terms of mass incarceration. Something like 50% of federal prisoners are in there for drug charges. At the state level, it's closer to 8-10%.

Problem being that federal drug charges are almost exclusively on large organized crime related charges. Many times soldiers from drug gangs get busted on drug charges cause they can't tie them directly to any bodies. Even though they are soldiers, and as such their entire job consists of murder. They're good at covering their tracks

And as for state penn prisoners.. those drug charges are usually at the dealer level too. And 90+ percent of the people in prison are in State prisons. So the number of actual non violent drug offenders is miniscule at best.
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Old 11-22-2020, 06:57 PM   #280 (permalink)
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I don't doubt it but when that's all you look for that's all you see.
One year I taught in one of the poorest schools in Florida. 100% free lunch.

Not that poor people can’t be good parents but it wasn’t just what I was looking for it’s all I saw. Endlessly. And yes I blame them for having kids. If you’re in hell you don’t think what this place needs is a baby unless you’re insane. But yeah they’re a product of 400 years of oppression. They’re victims and it’s wrong to blame the victim but there’s never been any shortage of rich people hatred coming from me. After we reclaim what those rich thieves have stolen then we can build a decent world to bring kids into.

Like the first 80% of your post everything starts with wealth redistribution.

That’s the answer to pretty much everything.
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