littleknowitall

Written by our singer, what y'all think?~

written to guitar riffs and excuse the structure dictations in brackets, i cant be arsed to get rid of them.

Get Up, Get On
(Intro - drums, slidey guitar bit then straight into verse)
Smiling like a winner, spinning on a golden wheel,
Moving like a sinner, a target for the enemy,
Always keep it moving, twisting words and alibis,
Always keep it moving, take it to the borderline,
Smiling like a winner, spinning on a golden wheel,
Moving like a sinner, a target for the enemy,
Always keep it moving, twisting words and alibis,
Always keep it moving, take it to the borderline,
(CHORUS)
GET UP, ON AND MOVE IT ON!
GET UP GET ON AND MOVE IT LIKE A MOTHER****ER!
GET UP GET ON AND MOVE IT ON!
GET UP GET ON AND MOVE IT LIKE A MOTHER ****ER!
(GUITAR FILL, THEN BACK INTO VERSE)
I’m the satisfaction, salvation in a silver suit,
Sell you what you’re needing, You’re gonna give me all you lose,
I’m the medication, I’m the answer to the call,
Got it all in my hand, I’m the high before the fall,
I’m the satisfaction, salvation in a silver suit,
Sell you what you’re needing, You’re gonna give me all you lose,
I’m the medication, I’m the answer to the call,
Got it all in my hand, I’m the high before the fall,
(CHORUS)
(GUITAR FILL, VERSE WITH GUITAR SOLO)
(VERSE - REPATE OF VERSE ONE)
Smiling like a winner, spinning on a golden wheel,
Moving like a sinner, a target for the enemy,
Always keep it moving, twisting words and alibis,
Always keep it moving, take it to the borderline,
Smiling like a winner, spinning on a golden wheel,
Moving like a sinner, a target for the enemy,
Always keep it moving, twisting words and alibis,
Always keep it moving, take it to the borderline,
(CHORUS)
(END ON LAST LINE OF CHORUS)

this next one's about atention seeking teenage lesbians.
'lipstick lesbians' so to speak, we know too many...

South Of The Border
(INTRO - GUITAR, BASS AND THEN DRUMS)
(VERSE)
Hands are shaking, no one wants to say a thing,
Guilt is waking, holding onto anything,
Glitter peeling, wipe away the night before,
Got a feeling tonight you’re gonna get some more,
She’s got the lipstick fever,
And it’ll never leave her,
She’s got the lipstick fever,
You know you can’t believe her!
(CHORUS)
She wanted something but she begged too much,
Longed too long for the special touch,
Put the word out all over town,
Lick it up, Baby, ‘cos you’re going down!
(REPEAT INTRO)
(VERSE)
Heads are buzzing, lipstick’s gonna leave a mark,
Kiss and make up, holding out into the dark,
Got the sugar all along the fingers tips,
Sweetest vengeance, tastes much better on the lips,
She’s got the lipstick fever,
And it’ll never leave her,
She’s got the lipstick fever
You know you can’t believe her,
(CHORUS)
(REPEAT INTRO - THEN VERSE WITH BASS SOLO)
(VERSE)
The Smile is fading, feeling’s gonna multiply,
Killing egos, leave a young girl asking why,
Another t-shirt, just a label on a sleeve,
An empty socket, who the hell can you believe?
She’s got the lipstick fever,
And it’ll never leave her,
She’s got the lipstick fever,
You know you can’t believe her,
(CHORUS)
(END ON LAST LINE OF CHORUS)

Empty
(Intro and verse)
I don’t need you like you say I do,
I know you need me but I don’t need you,
I see you moving in the avenue,
I see you dancing in the video,
Better the devil than you knew before,
Bitter the pill and still you beg for more,
Detonation in the dead of night,
Motivation just to stay alive,
You know she’s empty again
That girl is empty
(CHORUS - PLAY 4 TIMES, VOCALS ONLY ON LAST TWO)
Locked inside where nobody sees,
Don’t you pin your **** on me,
White angel, smoke in her eyes,
Painkilling smile, knives in her side,
Locked inside where nobody feels,
Don’t you pin your **** on me,
White angel, smoke in her eyes.
Painkilling smile, knives in her side
(VERSE)
Been here before, this all looks the same,
Leave your mark upon the window pane,
Flaking skin and a bloody stain,
You got me mixed up with the things you feign,
Baby lied about what was done,
Dirty looks and a favoured son,
Baby lied about what was done,
Dirty looks and a favoured son,
You know she’s empty again,
That girl is empty
(CHORUS)
(VERSE WITH GUITAR SOLO - THEN VERSE WITH VOCALS)
Sepia smiling but the meaning fades,
Hurts to think about the pledge she made,
Blown away by all the dirt she gave,
Opened wide another willing slave,
Shattered silence and the twists of fate,
Pumping veins, the bodies fuelling hate
The shattered silence and the twists of fate,
Pumping veins the bodies fuelling hate
You know she’s empty again,
That girl is empty
(CHORUS)
(SMALL VERSE)
That girl is empty again,
You know she’s empty again
(END ON LAST LINE)


Any opinions will be welcomed regardless.

TheUsedToolguy

I think it's not too bad, the first one sounds like a Saliva song

PaperHurricanesAndPlanes

One at a time slick.

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littleknowitall

heh was hoping for some more input on these, but thanks.

sleepy jack

You'd probably get more input if you posted them one at a time and one or two days apart, otherwise its crazy intimidating.

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littleknowitall

well i dunno, pick one...

PaperHurricanesAndPlanes

See, I was right. The best part was when you said "Verse with bass solo." Lol.

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littleknowitall

we were using the directions for structure in practice :P

Kyren Tsunami

nice work, I guess we're a similiar ^^, some of my lyrics have rythms in every line. XD Evermore, when I read it, my mouth start singing on it own, it's a weird habit when i reading someone's works however is it use for any kind of rock genre?

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all the songs I've Wrotes cames from experiences from the past, present and future.

DontRunMeOver

I think these lyrics will work very well for rock in terms of style, your singer seems to have a knack for hooky lines. "Lipstick fever", "bodies fuelling hate", things like that will sound great with heavy guitars.

Having said that, the lyrics in the verses for all three songs seemed to be using the same pattern over and over again, with similar numbers of syllables in each line. I wouldn't be surprised if your singer is re-hashing the same musical ideas for the verse of each song. A lot of people do this, but its **** so make sure he's not doing it!

OH! And I know from experience that he's currently using too many words. It's hard to trust a lyric if there aren't a few 1,2 or 3 syllable lines kicking around, especially in the choruses. Keep the great lines and chop away at the rest. Chop chop.

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