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Originally Posted by Dirty
WTF wait, so a rubber broke and she didn't want to have sex for a year after that?
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Haha, yeah. Yeah we did pretty much everything there is to do except the actual ****ing, obviously.
My girlfriend was in a bad mental state at that point in time and her going to the doctor to get er prescription for the pill was really out of the question. I understood that. I didn't like it by the way. It's ****ing frustrating. But there was not much to do at it at that point.
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Sex was how our relationship started and how it ended, which I think is pretty fitting considering once you stripped away the sex and dirty jokes and stuff there wasn't a whole lot there.
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Funny you should say that.
It sort of was impossible for my ex and me not to have sex when we were together, long before we had a relationship. There definitely was more to the relationship than sex, but it sort of broke the ice when it came to talking about beginning a realtionship.
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So we banged for a few months cause sex was what we did best with each other but then after like 5 months or so she said she couldn't do it anymore. Cause we were in this constant state of limbo of wanting to get back together but doubting it would work out, so basically just banging til one of us found someone else.
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Oh I see this happening with us too at some time.
She has a boyfriend now so, no way, but I wouldn't be surprised if the same would happen. I don't think that's a good idea... But we'll see.
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I think girls are generally just more emotionally invested with sex. And I could tell our sex after breaking up wasn't nearly as good.
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Never really got the chance to try that out.
As far as sex goes, I mentioned this somewhere before, I would have sex without a relationship, I won't have sex without love. I tried fooling myself over that one time and it sucked. So I am, in that way, emotionally invested with sex.
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But sk, you DON'T have a typical relationship with your ex, so i see why it might be hard for you to imagine not seeing her. Personally, I feel like it's just too different seeing someone as a girlfriend then trying to see them as a friend.
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I have seen her as a friend for years before we started having sex and having a relationship. And it's ****ing hard to see eachother differently. But, at least in this case, we got used to it.
Doesn't mean I don't want us to get together again, but I actually can live with the thought we'll never be together and... well... move on
. There were points this seemed impossible, but I somehow got through that period and now I'm fine with it.
I understand that there's a lot of people who have been there and say 'man what are you doing to yourself?' but I don't think any of them went through an awful year of misery just to keep it together and found themselves starting to feel good again.
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I don't act the same way with my girlfriend as I would with my female friends. Just little stuff like your protective instincts coming into play or just seeing an ex and, without even thinking about it, instinctively put your arm around her or kiss her forehead or something like that. Know what I'm sayin?
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Sure, same here. But I would do the same with my female friends.
It's just well... This:
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Old habits die hard I guess.
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I never had these habits with my female friends. But I do have this protective instinct. Less than with my girlfriend, obviously. We've been together for years and I just know when something is wrong, I know what she's afraid of everytime she has to go somewhere, I know what (and this is a tricky one) she feels like when her new boyfriend treats her the way you just shouldn't treat her. Not because it's particularly bad, but just because she doesn't work that way. So yeah, I understand what you mean.
Eitherway, I am protective of all my female friends, but there's obviously a difference between them and my ex. Mainly in a physical (hugging/kiss on the forehead, like you mentioned) way. You just do this stuff easier with your ex as it still feels 'normal'. But I wouldn't think of it as strange should I do the same with my female friends.
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My ex lives 5 hours away now and we've gone our separate ways and don't talk anymore.
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2 hours away, growing closer every day, talk daily
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Eventually you just get to a realization that you are NOT meant for each other and are NEVER going to work as a couple. sk, the reason you don't feel like that and still want to see your ex is cause you want her back and still think theres a chance you two could be together.
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Ghehe, no, the reason is that we are meant for eachother but in a different way than we may have thought in the first place. She and I agree on that.
You sort of make it sound like I'm desperate, but I'm not the only one keeping this contact alive. She's the one sending me a text with a sweet good morning text, she's the one sending me a post card with something nice in it. I do the same, obviously. But if you think I'm running after her, think twice. That's definitely not the case.
And me wanting her back? I don't know. Not as it used to be.
I even get the feeling I get used to the idea of not having her back and she's actually becoming more close every day. There were times when we wouldn't talk to eachother in two, three days. Now there's a text message from her when she wakes up, when she goes to sleep, when she comes back from the store, when she's in the train to school, when she's in the train back from school. I love that, by the way. I like being in contact a lot with my friends.
Gheh, it was pretty shocking to see the SMS count on her phone.
She had her phone for a couple of days.
Her boyfriend: 15 texts
Her mom: 2 texts
Her best friend: 6 texts
Me: 280 texts
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It's meant to be that way dude. You'll understand it sometime.
In the meantime, just take it as it is. I'm really really fine with it
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Not desperate, not feeling down, I do see other girls, it's allright.