Quote:
Originally Posted by Conan
To elaborate,
We were best friends before and after our thing, right? We love each other and all that, but she's not really "in love" with me, whereas the I am with her. And since we've both been through relationships that ended friendships for the same reason, she decided not to take ours any further. I can't expect to remain her best friend if I can't be cool with her boyfriend. So yeah, it's some awful Jennifer Lopez romantic comedy or something.
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Unless you can seriously stop being "in love" with her and start to see her as nothing more than a platonic friend, there will be issues. I know this because it happened to me. I was convinced we could be best friends always yaayy but that **** just didn't work. I met the boyfriend and, naturally, I hated him. I felt like I could easily get her back from that tool. Well, I didn't and all it did was result in some personally humiliating situations. Our "friendship" eventually died off as I slowly realized I could never see her that way. After a month or two of not seeing her at all it got better. A LOT better.
I guess my advice, if you can muster the will power, is to just nip it in the bud. It's more worth going through horrible pain for a couple months now than extended pain over the course of your entire friendship. I have seen (very few) exceptions, but in my experience lovers can't be friends. Just ask yourself...do you want to be friends because she's so awesome you just want her in your life in some capacity, or do you want to be friends because you have a faint - maybe even subconscious - hope you will get back together?