I think dirtys right when he puts it in that perspective. By the bolder in that post it seems like you don't really want it and it's a massive thing to commit to. If your heart isn't really in it then don't, it's real people you'd be dealing with and not something I'd want my medic to take a gamble on. You could go into loads of other jobs! That you'd probably still not be sure about, but isn't as consequential. At the end of the day, you know what's best for yourself lass
don't worry about it.