Quote:
Originally Posted by Freebase Dali
But in the interest of knowledge, what would you say went wrong with your marriage, and what advice would you have for someone who may be considering tying the noose... er.. knot?
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When assessing what went wrong, it tends to both piss me off and sadden me, because most of it was out of my control.
Not that it was a contributing factor, but my wife is medically diagnosed as bipolar and paranoid schizophrenic. It's not her fault, so I cannot hold it against her, nor have I ever tried to. She sometimes decided to hate me out of the blue and was not always in her right frame of mind. This made it hard for both of us, but I love her regardless and worked through it.
--She was having a bipolar episode 2 summers ago, and her father and I had no choice but to have her committed to a mental hospital against her will. She was awake for over a week straight, having lucid conversations with her dead relatives and drawing all over herself with markers. I was extremely worried about her safety. Even though it was for her own good, she held the hospital stay against me from that day forward.
--Back in June of 2009 I was diagnosed with epilepsy. She saw my seizures as a burden on her, having to "babysit" me as she put it.
--She refused to work, and I did not make enough to pay all of the rent and the bills (most of which were hers), so we were forced to move in with family. She resented me for not being as good of a provider as she deserved.
--I lost my job earlier this year due to taking a medical leave for my epilepsy, and she again resented me for this.
--She says that I was not supportive enough of her post-partum depression after having our son, she resented me for that. I did everything I could, but it's hard to help a problem that is in someone's head. I did what I could, but she was really shut off and distant, so there wasn't much that I could do.
--In summation, it was mostly her resentment towards me that did us in. She told me that if I made more money and could afford our own apartment then she wouldn't have filed for divorce (really make's me feel loved you know).
As far as any tips? If considering tying the not, remember that you also have enough rope to hang yourself. Choose wisely.