Nice work so far, Pauhla. You've got some interesting ideas and also it seeks a natural talent for writing. Your style is very relatable in a sense that it's kind of like your right here, talking to me. Are you planning this to be a sort of memoir, or what? Where are you going with this? I noticed the "Chapter 1" at the top of the page, and also the fact that you ended the piece a bit abruptly, so I dunno. You may want to work on developing and concluding your thoughts neatly so that your work doesn't seem like just a couple of paragraphs of ideas. Other than that, yeah, I'd say you're doing pretty well. Keep it up.
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