Quote:
Originally Posted by Odyshape
What do you guys think about the "Art of pickup" and all those advice things you see all over (especially on porn websites). When I hear a lot about all of these techniques guys use to "pick-up" girls I can't help but think that those aren't really all that effective.
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It ultimately depends on whether or not you're looking to establish a fulfilling emotionally intimate relationship or if you just want to add another notch to your bed post. The only thing pickup 'techniques' are really for is so that you can psychologically manipulate another person into letting them use their body instead of your hand to rub one out.
Also consider the source of those techniques and advice, nothing about porn or picking up is about substance or reality, it's all about superficial fantasy. It's flat out impossible to establish any sort of worthwhile intimate relationship if you're not honest about yourself during your initial meetings, very little about the 'art' of picking up is about being honest. I'd be surprised to find out 'never tell the truth' wasn't one of their top rules or something.
Being assertive or dominant also doesn't mean you have to be controlling or overbearing either. It's less about telling the girl what to do and more about being able to be clear with the girl about what you'd like to do. Like the difference between:
-Hey babe, tonight after work you're going to meet me at this place at this time and then we're going to do stuff and then go there afterwards.
vs
-Hey babe, I was thinking I'd like to take you out for dinner after work tonight and then maybe we can hit up that cafe you've talked about recently.