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Originally Posted by Odyshape
Interestingly enough I have never had an experience where a person has ever made me super attached. That's usually like the first thing people think of when they think of desperation.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Odyshape
Duga is there any life experiences that you had that helped you mature some what out of this kind of over analytical obsessive thinking?
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Getting attached to someone is one of those life experiences. Obsessing over materialistic things for comfort is easy...you get tired of it, throw it away, and maybe come back to it whenever you want. Getting attached to someone and having them attached to you in return is a different experience altogether. You don't just have your concerns to worry about, you have theirs. Rather than generalize this, I'll let you know how it went down for me.
I met a girl my senior year of high school. She was gorgeous, we could talk on and on for hours, and most importantly - she wanted me. This was so much the opposite of my experience up until that point that I got completely lost in it. Like my obsession with music, I let myself make her my world not realizing that like music and many other materialistic things, I would get tired of her. It hit me and I didn't know how to deal with it. She had followed me to college, so I felt very guilty and it became very hard to just end it. It resulted in a lot of psychological stress for the both of us. We eventually did end it, I started missing her (despite getting tired of music sometimes I always come back to it, and it happened much in this way) and did some very embarrassing things to try to get her back. It didn't work.
Despite this, I don't regret one bit the way it went down. It taught me a lot about myself...more than any other experience I can think of. Somehow I was able to extrapolate this experience on a much broader scale. I am patient with everyone, I am very understanding, and I am very honest (not because I want to be honest for my own benefit, but for the benefit of others). Not just that, but I was able to figure out exactly what I wanted in another relationship. Now I am with a girl who is 1000x more what I want, and even when I can feel that weary feeling creeping up, I'm able to ignore it because I know she has everything I want. This experience also helped me relate and really FEEL what others might be going through more than just analyzing it on my own. In that way, I'm able to calm down from my anxiety much faster than I used to.
All in all, these things just have to come naturally. Realize you are on a ride and life will take you wherever it wants. As much as you think you can rationalize and predict everything that will happen, you won't. I am consistently surprised by life, and though I know I will have to deal with stress and over analyzing for all of it, I also know more crazy things are coming my way and I can't wait for it.