To finish up my commentary...
"The Landscape of Thought"—I thought was well-written and a great idea, but it could benefit from some re-working. The reality of the situation isn't that surprising as a big reveal at the end and I think the story might be more interesting if we know what's going on right from the beginning (to possibly give a better sense of what's at stake), with some interesting twists and turns along the way. I'm guessing this is by Frownland.
"The Lonely Dreamer"—I'm not much of a fan of poetry so probably not the best person to comment, but I think this could have benefitted from either a stricter adherence to serious poetic structure or from something that moved beyond a simple rhyme scheme. It had some nice descriptive moments though. I'm guessing iluvwubs for this.
|