Quote:
Originally Posted by Sljslj
A short poem....
I've ran away from everyone that loved me
'Cause I couldn't stand that I screwed them
Even when they said they'd forgive me
I ran 'cause I couldn't forgive myself
Now I'm in another land and they love me here
But I'm making the same mistakes
And I don't think I'll be forgiven this year
I can only kill for so long 'till someone fires back
This time I run away into the black
I can only be happy if I'm alone
I can't function in this world
This is what the past has shown
I'll wait here in this position: curled
Waiting for something
Maybe nothing
It's all the same
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Oh man, that first stanza hits me pretty deep lol. And I've definitely used "it's all the same" as an ending lyric and also sort of as a personal philosophy.
Overall, it's a pretty great poem, I looked at some of your others and enjoy how visceral they are. The only critique or feedback I might have is that your poems seem to express one or a few emotions of the same spectrum, i.e. anger, sadness, regret, etc. If you put in an attempt at happiness or yearning for something positive, it makes the negatives even more powerful by contrast.