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Originally Posted by TheBig3KilledMyRainDog
Ok heres what I mean by specific. When you write "Doing a funny thing with his hind legs" is too open to interpertation. While I strongly agree with fenix in saying that you should eat the paper this was written on, we can still use it as an example.
A funny thing- what is that, what could it be? Was he doing it, was the guy doing it to him? Is it actually comical, it is funny in the sence of odd? Exactly how mnay diffrent things can dogs do with their back legs.
This is where I have a probalem with unspecivity. Be specific.
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Gotcha. Although I would say there's only so much specificity you can squeeze into a 10 syllable line. While it might have somehow been better as a written lyric if I'd said "strapped to a pleasure machine by dark leather bonds, with the stark, unpadded frame pressing against his freshly shaved skin, sending fearful yet excited tremors through his hind legs" there is no way that this would have fitted into the meter of the song. Also more detail probably would have made me feel sick.
I see what you mean though. Being boringly vague is different to using interesting metaphors and arty ambiguous phrases. A lot of the time I'm sure that kind of thing appear in my lyrics without me realising it.
Thanks for the comments so far, if anybody else wants to offer some (or if those who've already posted want to offer more) then fire away.