Originally Posted by Salami

I'm in a bad mood and it's mainly due to my bike, my best friend and British weather.
You know how the hangers for the rear mech are designed to fail to protect the frame? Due to the Derbyshire terrain and my recklessness and impulsive behaviour, the hangers keep getting bent one after the other. So yesterday I fitted another one on but the sprocket derailer still didn't move and gave no response for a gear shift.
The problem was that the housing for the gear cable had sheared off and there was an unsightly splaying of steel wires coiling around like the hair of Medusa. I ordered a new gear cable and hanger yesterday from our beloved local merchant Mr Harry Hill, but the gable came with no sheathing.

Anyway, I got the housing for it this morning and attempted to fix the sprocket derailer. BEAR IN MIND THIS TOOK HOURS AND I WAS IN THE POURING RAIN ALL THE TIME. Haha, you think, whilst you chuckle thinking what a soft little pussy I am complaining about a bit of rain and wind, smirking to yourself that it's nice and dry where you are and nonchalantly look over your shoulder before re-opening the porn tab to see that a fourth figure has joined the party but the gender of which is indeterminable.

Anyway, the problem is I'm going on tour tomorrow on a ride that will last hundreds of kilometers and will go over the most hostile terrain England has to offer, and I'm going to look a bit daft in front of the lads when I can't do my patented Salami Sideflip on the bike "because there's something wrong with the gears".

Not to be deterred by your mocking laughter, I proceeded to detach the mech from the rear hanger, insert the new sheathing on the new cable, adjust the bearings, reattach the rear mech and adjust the cable to exactly the right length so it now works perfectly.

Huh. How does that make you feeel, to know that I have succeeded in spite of your scorn, and despite being as wet as a drowned rat, I have managed once more to keep that hacking-iron of a bike I got in 2007 from falling apart? Huh?