In bed, 2:30 AM when suddenly
BEEP! I shrug, wonder what that is, then a few seconds later
BEEP! again. I begin to wonder more intensely.
BEEP! again. Damn it! I get out of bed, look out the window. Is it outside? Is it coming from the brand new extension built in the garden? Doesn't seem to be. Crap I think, better go look.
BEEP!
So down I go, freezing as I'm not exactly fully dressed, and stare into the face of a blinking light on one of our (also brand new) smoke alarms. FFS ! I think, the damn thing's batteries must be running down! Eff it!
BEEP!
Simple, you say. So what? Take the batteries out and gtf back to bed. Ah, if only!
These are NEW style alarms and they apparently run off the mains. So I think, maybe it has a backup battery and THAT's what beeping. Oh yeah, by the way,
BEEP! So I go looking for the instruction booklet that came with the alarms (we had about seven fitted, council rules apparently). It's really detailed, and this is now edging to 3AM, I'm still freezing, and my sister is moaning that she can't sleep. Just take the battery out, she says, as I try to calmly explain that's not how it works.
BEEP!
So I read that you can take the cover off the thing, but you MUST shut off mains power first. Now, I can't just hit the main switch, because my sister's orthopaedic bed and mattress both run on electricity, and cut the power to either and she's in trouble, specially the mattress as it instantly begins to deflate.
BEEP!
**** this, I think. I can't do this at three in the morning, and tell her so and go back to bed.
BEEP!
Not in there too long when my conscience gets to me and I say FI got to try this again. So I do. I get back up and trip every major switch I can, nothing doing.
BEEP!
I get her a set of earplugs, tell her we'll have to ride it out and I go back to bed.
BEEP!
Next morning (THIS morning; it's Sunday) I ring the council guy who luckily is at home and says he'll come out to sort it for me. He comes out and takes the alarm apart (WITHOUT shutting off the mains, but how was I to know?) and yet the thing STILL won't shut up!
BEEP!
Confused, I notice that the beeping doesn't sound like it's coming from directly above me if I stand under the alarm. No, it's more like ... over here .. at the kitchen window...
BEEP!
I look on the sill and lo and behold! An old carbon monoxide alarm I forgot all about is beeping! I take out the batteries and silence!
Boy was my face red! And I could have sorted that last night had I known, but tunnel vision, y'know? I was sure it was the alarm on the ceiling.
That one's going in the bin tomorrow!
