Country Christmas Party --- Various Artists --- 2000 (Planet Song)
Yeah, I know Country music has its detractors, and is well placed to be the butt of many a joke about farmers, hicks and steel pedal guitars, but come on! This has got to set their cause back by fifty years at least! You have the likes of John Denver singing “Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer”, accompanied by a
very annoying children's choir, Charley Pride crooning about “Christmas in my town”, and Gene Autry, “the Singing Cowboy” himself, belting out a cracked version of “Frosty the snowman”! And that's without enduring “The 12 days of Christmas” in the company of the Nashville Session Singers, listening to Liberace
(Liberace?) doing “The little drummer boy” STOP IT (wasn't he a pianist? Oh, right: it's an instrumental piano version. Of course!) while Glen Campbell wishes you should “Have yourself a merry little Christmas”. Not bloody likely, Glen!
Even the class acts get roped in, with Crystal Gayle, one of the first ladies of Country, contributing a song called “Whose child is this?” set to the air of “Greensleeves” (must admit, it's quite nice), Lynn Anderson giving her rendition of “Joy to the world” and even the mighty Johnny Cash drawling “Hark the herald angels sing”. Oh yeah, and Charley Pride, not content with the one contribution, has to pop up near the end for an encore with “O little town of Bethlehem”. O dear, say I!
Now, before anyone asks “Well have you actually
listened to this album before damning it?” I check and see my ears are still attached and functioning, and I say no, not all the way. I've sampled some of the albums in this list; listened to a few tracks, as many as I could bear, but in the end they're essentially the same material, perhaps with the odd slant on one or two, but generally they're the Christmas songs, carols and hits we all know and either love or loathe.
Sure, there will be the odd original composition, and in those cases I'll lend them an ear, but otherwise it's just a quick hop-skip-and-a-jump through these albums to get a feel for them. How then do I feel justified in criticising something I haven't bothered to listen to? To that I say, it's Christmas, it's a bit of fun, and I don't have the time or desire to actually listen to all of the music here. I'm happy just to slag it off. You have a problem with that, here's a link
Google Image Result for http://dorrys.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/flip-the-bird1.jpg you can use...
(Don't worry, Country fans: I'm sure there's a “Metal's Greatest Christmas Hits” in there somewhere too, and if so it'll be getting just such a pasting. You are not alone!)
TRACKLISTING
1. Hark! The herald angels sing (Johnny Cash)
2. Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer (John Denver)
3. Virgin Mary (Lonnie Donegan)
4. Christmas in my home town (Charley Pride)
5. I heard the bells on Christmas (Eddy Arnold)
6. Holy night (Ronnie Milsap)
7. The twelve days of Christmas (The Nashville Session Singers)
8. Frosty the snowman (Gene Autry)
9. I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus (Bobby Sherman)
10. Christmas lullaby (Melanie)
11. The little drummer boy (Liberace)
12. Have yourself a merry little Christmas (Glen Campbell)
13. Jingle bells (Pat Boone)
14. Pretty paper (Willie Nelson)
15. What child is this (Crystal Gayle)
16. Joy to the world (Lynn Anderson)
17. O little town of Bethlehem (Charley Pride)
18. Sing we Noel (The Kingston Trio)