My god, a year already??
I wanted to take the time to compose a reply, not just throw something together Lee, but all I came up with that didn't sound too hollow is this:
It's always hard, terribly hard losing a loved one, but I think it must make it doubly hard when that loss occurs at a time generally taken to be one of joy and celebration. You no doubt feel guilty about not enjoying Christmas, and equally guilty about enjoying it. It probably seems almost disrespectful to be laughing and joking and wishing friends a happy Christmas when the one you so want to spend that season with is no longer by your side.
All I can say is, like others have said, be strong, particularly for the children, who'll need your support and guidance, and cliched as it sounds, every year that passes, every Christmas that goes by will lessen the pain slightly until finally you'll be able to properly celebrate the holiday without feeling too much guilt or sorrow.
You know she'd want you to enjoy yourself, and would probably hate it if you were feeling sorry for yourself, so though it's hard maybe just paint on that smile and face the Christmas with the strength, fortitude, good humour and charm we all know you possess in abundance.
And faith or no faith, I'm sure she's looking down on you all and hoping you have a good and peaceful Christmas.
As do we all here.
Peace and love, my friend. It'll get better...