Quote:
Originally Posted by Engine
Far be it from me to give give dating advice but in the case of internet "hookups", an emotional affair is what's being had.
However, I think the OP made a point (more than once) to say that his current physical relationship is established as casual, uncommitted, and not monogamous. So.. why would his "internet hookup" be any worse than him dating multiple people in real life? That's pretty normal for humans.
I'm confused about why people presume that the real-life girl expects monogamy. OP said expressly that she does not. If she does then, yeah, I agree with the "you're a sleazy douche" comments but he claims that she does not. If in doubt, he should talk to real-life girl about it and accept the consequences, as has already been said.
I agree that OP shouldn't lie by omission to the real-life hookup if, as everybody presumes, the real-life one would be concerned/alarmed. But I think it's kind of offensive to the real-life hookup for people to assume that she even wants to have that conversation. OP said they're not committed. Maybe she would also like to retain her own privacy.
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I think what he said was it's an unspoken agreement, but he didn't say she had agreed to be non-monogamous. HE's assuming she is, but he doesn't know. AFAICS none of this has been discussed, so he doesn't in reality know what she thinks. It's his ONLINE girl that understands the arrangement between them, but then, it's a lot easier to accept that when you're miles apart and unlikely to meet much, if at all.
TMK the "real" girl does not know about this relationship and has not been asked or given a choice in it.
From what I read....