The issue I'm having right now is that they're STILL not able to diagnose me.
I'm not Bipolar, because the psychosis is too prevalent. And schizophrenia seems like a long shot, because one of my issues is that I have the most vivid of dreams, lucid approximately 25% of the time without ever making any effort towards this, and schizophrenics are purportedly not known for vivid, full color lucid dreaming.
I also worry that my googling everything that happens to me and dismissing it, letting it play its course but burying it, has had a negative impact on my ability to be diagnosed. It's like, "Have you ever felt like someone was reading your thoughts,"
And I'm like, "Yeah, with utmost conviction. But I know that's irrational, so I just suppress it. I let myself think that, but at the same time, I got through the effort of reiterating that it's just going to run its course."
I'm just saying....not going to be happy if I really have some weird, hybrid, unidentifiable disorder.
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It's a hand-me-down, the thoughts are broken
Perhaps they're better left unsung
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