Mondo Bungle

So I'm spending this month, and perhaps the next, eight miles along the highway between Cannon Beach and Seaside in Oregon. I must say, it's beautiful, at least compared to living in Reno. I'm staying in a sort of cottage right on the highway, and my backyard is a deep, green forest, ripe with life. I've been here for only four days, but it's given me time to think about things. Back home, (well, it's not so much a home anymore, since I won't be returning to Reno to take up residence) I had so much stacked on my plate, yet at the same time, nothing at all. It was an abundance of general teenage angst that made everything seem like so much more than it was. During my last month there, I went through a mental breakdown, several episodes of severe hopelessness and anxiety, being without a place to go or sleep, (as a product of the move) and my outlook was all too bleak. I might (most likely) get into more of that later. I can relax here, calm down and take walks in the woods, along the river, or even at the beach. I can separate myself from life for a moment. A while ago I would worry that my own friends didn't appreciate me, which was a factor leading to the aforementioned mental breakdown, but I don't have to worry about anything here. And it feels good that I left on a positive note, with my friends throwing me a small soiree. That gave me a real nice feeling, being with all them before I left, and right after my troubles. I really didn't have anything to worry about at all, they were all working while I wasn't, it's understandable that they didn't have much free time. It's just my mind (I seriously think I have some kind of disorder, I don't know what though) that made me believe that no one was there, that there was no one to turn to. It's always been like that for me, for as long as I can remember I've had depression and anxiety problems. But like I said, here on the coast, I don't have to worry about anything like that. I've been passing the time exploring, picking wild raspberries and blackberries, (they grow like weeds) writing songs, reading, and basically relaxing. I don't think it's even reached ninety degrees since I got here, the day I took the greyhound I was in Redding, and it got up to 115. I think this should be good for my mental health, I'll keep you posted on life up here.

Anyway........
I can't get enough of this erratic, spacey, and downright crazy stuff.




Gigantic Brain has liquefied mine. I'd say the craziest cybergrind band there is, and don't get me wrong, I love Agoraphobic Nosebleed and Wadge to death, but this goes above and beyond. A wild mixture of grind, ambient, video game music, and spacey new age type stuff, it's sure to concuss.

__________________