I have started this entry a couple of times but then I end up just deleting the whole thing to start over from scratch. The day after I wrote my last entry my mother passed away. I went to visit her that day and spent 3 hours with her. I left to go home and two hours later I received the call that she passed on. I wanted to make a post with mother related songs or songs relating to people moving on or finding an afterlife but it all feels extremely cliche and in personal.
In the end, I decided to just post a few of her favorite songs that she loved to sing along to and I would sing with her but extremely off key to make fun of the song.
I'm so glad that her service is over and done with and it went off without a hitch.
I went to it yesterday. I'm terrible at funeral services. I tend to smile a lot and every little thing that gets said is just incredibly funny to me. I have to fight back from laughing out loud and it tends to be strange because everyone around me is crying their hearts out and being emotional and I have this opposite reaction. Majority of the time I just try to keep people from seeing my smile so they don't think that I'm smiling/laughing at their pain. After the service, we went out to eat a Chinese buffet which is what we did the last time when my uncle passed away three years ago. My goal this time around was to make sure that everyone else pitched in and that my grandmother didn't have to worry about any costs because she picked up most of the costs last time with my uncle and she's still paying off credit card bills from that funeral proceeding. I wanted to practice a bit on my guitar when I came home but I was just so exhausted that I passed out. I woke up that morning feeling a bit on the sick side. Sore throat and all that jazz.
R.I.P. mom.
