I had a nice, normal sexual experience, replete with awkwardness.
"Do you want me to...ah. Yes. I could try left-handed maybe? That might lessen the pressure."
and
"Jesus, are you sure you're gay?""
and
"No, please, wait...don't scatter bomb me. Last time I couldn't walk for a wee---oh, GOD! I told you not to scatterbomb me! How is that sexually appealing?"
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It's a hand-me-down, the thoughts are broken
Perhaps they're better left unsung
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