Tristesse

‘Teenage Dream’, Perry’s most successful of her three mainstream albums to date, spawned five number one singles making her the first female artist to achieve this in history, and the second artist ever after Michael Jackson (for Bad).


After hearing ‘One Of The Boys’, her first mainstream album, I had a pretty good opinion of her. I’m not the sort of guy that believes that all popstars should be role models to little kids, but if pre-adolescent girls were going to choose someone to look up to, I thought Katy Perry would be a pretty good shout; lyrically ‘One Of The Boys’ dealt with issues that are generally relatable and manages to present an album that has just the right balance between soppiness and ass-kickingness . Many of the songs on the album rely heavily on electric guitar and an actual drum kit, which in my opinion suited her voice and the songs perfectly, like ‘Waking Up In Vegas’ (below) – if I had heard that and not been aware of Katy Perry I might have assumed it was a decent pop-rock band.




Unfortunately, ‘Teenage Dream’ was a huge let down. The two most popular singles from ‘One Of The Boys’, ‘I Kissed A Girl’ and ‘Hot N Cold’ were two of the only songs on the album to not be based around guitar parts and have acoustic drums, but were enjoyable mixed in with the other more rock influenced tracks. On ‘Teenage Dream’ however, most of the tracks are jam packed with synthesisers, fake hand claps and unnecessary vocal effects. I don’t quite understand why she felt the need to change her style so significantly.




Starting the album, I enjoyed the first four songs, which I had heard before as singles. There was an obvious difference lyrically and in theme, moving from a relatable, genuine lyrics to lyrics that just made her come across as a bit up herself and phony, but it wasn’t bad enough that I couldn’t enjoy the songs. Despite not being a particularly great song, ‘California Gurls’ has succeeded in providing a music video that is undoubtedly a fantastic spectacle.



I think the music video for ‘California Gurls’ would have been better as the one for ‘Teenage Dream’, because as a teenager I frequently have dreams involving the scene shown above.


It was within the first five seconds of the 5th track on the album that I realised something was wrong, and that it was only going to get worse.
If it were possible, I’d like to erase the song ‘Peacock’ from history. It has got to be one of the worst songs I think I’ve ever heard. It isn’t even slightly subtle – the song makes it so incredibly obvious that it is about looking at wangs that it would be impossible for anyone not to realise what it’s about.
“Are you brave enough to let me see your peacock? Don’t be a chicken boy stop acting like a bi-atch” being one of the more charming lines in the song.




You know what I said about thinking she would be alright for girls to have as a role model? I’ve changed my mind.


After that, it’s just bad. Ridiculous irrelevant similes in the lyrics, bland synth beats and vocals that sound like even she has realised that what she’s singing is complete bullshit. The cliché love songs clash with the dirty ‘risque’ songs hideously (maybe she was trying to go along the same lines as ‘I Kissed A Girl’ with the song ‘Hummingbird Heartbeat’, but it really didn’t work and just seemed incredibly fake; “you make me feel like I’m losing my virginity the first time, every time when you’re touching me”) and whereas the lyrics from the previous album were relatable, these fell into two categories:

1) About her perfect her relationship is and the intensity of her ‘love’, using metaphors and similes so cringe-inducing that it’s virtually impossible to relate to them (“Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?”) - No. No I do not.

2) Trying to appear controversial and like a ‘bad girl’ (“We went streaking in the park, skinny dipping in the dark, then had a ménage a trios”)


I wouldn’t mind so much if the vocals were backed up with some chugging guitars or kick-ass drumming, but when it’s just her vocals over an uninteresting synthesised drum beat with some generic effects layered over it, there’s nothing to enjoy about it.




This leads me on to her latest release, ‘Prism’. I could tell just by looking at the album cover that this wasn’t going to be like her first album either.
It seems that ‘Teenage Dream’ was merely a stepping stone in Perry’s transformation from indie tomboy in ‘One Of The Boys’ to her latest incarnation as bland dance vomit in ‘Prism’. She has combined a strange mixture of influences in ‘Prism’, which is essentially a dance album. A couple of tracks, including the popular single ‘Roar’ appear to be attempts at African inspired songs, but someone should tell Katy that just including bongos and having the occasionally animal imitation doesn’t make songs sound exotic. I quite like ‘Roar’, but it’s a sad state of affairs when it is the best song on an album. ‘Unconditionally’, the second single released from ‘Prism’, is ok, but nothing more. It’s the kind of song that has nothing special about it whatsoever, a generic “heartfelt emotional cry for help” that fails to deliver anything.


Then we come to the third single, ‘Dark Horse’. For some reason she enlisted some rapper I’d never heard of to feature on this track (although my knowledge of rap is severely limited, anyone who thinks the rap segment of this is decent is clearly deluded). The guy’s name is Juicy J, which just sounds to me like Jessie J’s American rapping cousin. The rest of the track is so-so.



I expect anyone who is into dance music might find something good in this, but as an indie rock kinda dude I failed to find anything that I would ever choose to listen to again. Katy was fine as she was on ‘One Of The Boys’, and there was no need for her to change her style. I don’t think I’ll be listening to any of her other albums again anytime soon (although I doubt she’ll mind, she must be rolling in it!)



I'm not going to try and make a habit of reviewing lady pop singers in this journal, it's going to be primarily indie/rock. But it's nice to get some guilty pleasures out there occasionally.

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