Carpe Mortem

I hate when people tell me their whole life story, or infect the good times with therapy hour conversations. When there's more than one doing this all either blow eachother or passively compete over who's more 'unique'.

Okay, so you're clinically depressed. Go tell a professional and lets get back to our conversation about who has the tiniest dong. I aint here to play mommy.

Edited for accuracy.