Trollheart

Hmm. I don't think so honey. If that was the case he would have posted thusly:


I spit my amb --- BEEEP! Disconnected.

I spit my -- BEEEP! Disconnected.

I spit --- BEEEP BEEEP! Disconnected.

I spit my ambrosia on my comp --- BEEP! Disconnected.

IN THE NAME OF ALMIGHTY ZEUS!!! WHO KEEPS PICKING UP THE FUCKING PHONE??!!! I'M ON THE INTERNET HERE! HELLO? HELLO? PERSEPHONE! PER-SEPH-O-NE! IS THAT YOU?

"So I says to her, you want to try doing it with a centaur and --- hold on --- WHAT THE FUCK YA WANT? I'M ON THE PHONE!"

YEAH I KNOW! GET OFF IT! I HAVE AN IMPORTANT MESSAGE TO LEAVE ON THE INTERNET!

INTERNET, INTERNET! THAT'S ALL YOU BLOODY DO! THOUGHT YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE LORD OF THE UNDERWORLD HUH? WHAT SORT OF DARK LORD SPENDS ALL HIS TIME ON THE INTERNET TALKING TO LOSERS HE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW? (No, hold on, I'll be with you in a minute. That dickhead Hades! Sometimes I don't know why I married him --- oh yeah. Right)

THEY'RE NOT LOSERS! SOME OF THEM REALLY KNOW ABOUT MUSIC YOU WOULDN'T EVEN ...

DO THEY KNOW HOW TO GET A DECENT HUSBAND WHO EARNS AN HONEST LIVING? (So anyway, back to this centaur ...)

YOU BITCH! I WISH YOU'D NEVER EATEN THAT FUCKIN' POMEGRANATE!

YEAH, SO DO I! SHOULD HAVE LISTENED TO MY MOTHER...

OH DON'T GET ME STARTED ON DEMETER! THAT FUCKIN' WHORE REALLY TRICKED ME! IF I'D KNOWN WHAT A BITCH HER DAUGHTER WAS...

YEAH YEAH! YADDA YADDA! TELL SOMEONE WHO CARES!

CAN YOU GET OFF THE PHONE please dear?

"So I says to her, I says..."

SIGH.

(Some time later...)

OK I'M FINISHED. GO NERD WITH YOUR NERDY FRIENDS ON THE NERDY INTERNET.

FINALLY! Okay then: "I spit my ambrosia on my computer after reading that -- BEEEPPPP! Disconnected.

WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!

Hello? HELLO?

"You call her a nymph, I call her a slut. That Echo, you wouldn't believe..."

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCKKKKKKKKKKK!

(sound familiar once?)
Thank god for Broadband, eh?

__________________
Trollheart: Signature-free since April 2018