Hi there, John.
I can suggest you a few things about your songwriting. And I would like to add my personal taste in songwriting, which might give you a few points to consider.
From professional aspect, in songwriting - as long as you don't have melody or instrumental music - you must have rhyming schemes, which are not basically writing a rhyme in the end of each line. It is more of knowing how to professionally use the language, and spread the meaning in your heart and yet have some arrangement. I can't really express this in words, sadly. Reading a little bit more about rhyming schemes might be helpful.
From personal aspect, I don't think it is likely to be commercial or potential, as its meaning is not really connectable among the society. You should share emotions in your songwriting, not to just write about how you love a certain animal. Though, using a certain animal as a metaphor might be pretty intriguing and original. In your case, you have no other meaning than just how precious this animal is. Personally, I can't connect the meaning, no offence.