Quote:
Originally Posted by OccultHawk
I women I impregnated got an abortion and I found out indirectly as she told another woman I was having an affair with while we were all sitting around the same table.
I felt very thankful and still do.
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The comedy of OccultHawk
Act 1, Scene 3
OccultHawk and friends are gathered at a table, eating lunch, when suddenly a conversation begins...
OccultHawk: My friends, I must congratulate you. This lunch was prepared most splendidly!
Friend 1: Quite! But it's hardly a surprise. We did, after all, use only the finest of ingredients.
Friend 2: And with my unmatched aptitude in all of the culinary arts, it was simply unimaginable that this meal would end up being anything other than perf...
Mistress 1: I just had an abortion!
All: ?
Friend 2: What? What are you talking about?
OccultHawk: Uh, heh... I think she's had a bit too much to drink tonight. Pay her no mind.
Mistress 2: Shut up OccultHawk. You were saying?
Mistress 1: Yeah, I got an abortion. Just thought everyone should know.
Mistress 3: Wait a minute, what?! Whose baby was it?
Mistress 1: Well... it was OccultHawk's.
Mistresses 2 and 3, together: What?!
OccultHawk: Ladies, ladies... clearly, she's just joking. You both know that i'm a one woman kind of guy.
Mistresses 2 and 3 glare at Occulthawk
OccultHawk: Oh, wait... I mean...
Friends 1 and 2, together: Uh... this is getting awkward. Maybe we should just leave you guys to talk about this?
OccultHawk: What? Nonsense! Stay! This is all just a big misunder...
Mistress 2: I'll hold back his arms!
Mistress 3: I've got his legs!
All Mistresses fall upon Occulthawk
Friends 1 and 2 exeunt, followed by a bear.
End scene.