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The Batlord · 04-23-2015, 11:33 PM

This is a review on RYM for Fleetwood Mac's Bare Trees.

Quote:

As I was listening to my old, original shiny cover version of this defining album of the early 70s, all I could think of was "conspiracy." I suspect that more high school virgins were deflowered to this album, and to Yes's Close to the Edge, than to any other albums in history, if my experience and that of my friends is any indication.

Back then, you either got started, got on, and got off before the album side was over, or you didn't get off at all, and in the day of the LP, that would have been difficult if girls insisted that you use condoms. I never even saw one of the evil things until I was about 32.

Then CD's are invented, and suddenly you can go at it for 40 minutes without having to interrupt the mood, get up, and change the record. Suddenly, women are demanding that men use condoms, and men don't object very strenuously because even though it's like taking a bath with your socks on, there is still a remote possibility of a not entirely unhappy ending if you have 40+ minutes to work with.

Still, it's not nearly as much fun, and the kind of music that high school kids who have safe sex listen to is not nearly as good as this.

And pot isn't the same either. Back then, if you tried to smoke a joint of $35 an ounce Columbian Red by yourself, you couldn't even get up out of your chair to get a beer. Now, cancer patients smoke $450 an ounce stuff while programming computers. WTF?!?

My daughter (who only exists in the first place because of my "religious" opposition to condom based contracteption) thinks Bare Trees sounds "unbearably wholesome." Well, yeah! Do you think I was going to try to seduce my goody two shoes wife with Raw Power blasting away in the background? Do I look that stupid, or what?

Paranoid conspiracy theory? I think not!

http://rateyourmusic.com/release/alb...ac/bare_trees/