I don't know whether this is really considered metal, and to be honest I don't really care too much. It's been hard trying to find a song with lyrics I can talk about that falls outside my own self-imposed criteria as to what is not acceptable, and it's taken a long time to finally settle on one, so this is what I'm going for.
Pain of Salvation are not a band I particularly have a lot of time for, or even know, but when we reviewed this album some time ago in the poor old PRAC (may its soul rest in peace) I was quite impressed with it, and in particular with this song.
“Rope ends”, by Pain of Salvation, from the album Remedy Lane, 2002
Music and lyrics by Daniel Gildenlöw
From what I can see, and again this is only pure personal speculation, the song concerns a woman who has had enough and just decides to end it all. That's nothing all that new, but the power of this song, for me, is the terrifying mundanity and ordinary everyday backdrop that this is played out against. We hear she has made sure
”The children are safe with her mom” while she attempts her suicide bid, but
”The shower chain broke, her neck hurts.”
This is when it really gets painful, as Gildenlöw describes how she chooses one of her husband's business ties --- such a mundane, boring thing, a tie worn to a meeting or to see a client, the very symbol of the workaday world and, interestingly, the object Ned Flanders described as a noose --- and deciding on a Winnie the Pooh one (so referencing the children as well as her hubby's perhaps less than adult taste in neckwear) she prays that
”Winnie is strong, and will not let her fall.” But life persists, as if to deny her her release, and the tie, though it is strong, becomes not the instrument of her demise. Rather, the decrepit state of the house comes to her aid, and the ceiling collapses, dropping her hard on the bathroom floor, where I think she dies after hitting her head, though I'm not sure. The final line would appear to support that though:
”Red stains on porcelain, and she's not there at all.”
Personally, for me, what's so shocking and powerful about this song is not that it features a young woman, a young mother ---
”Merely twenty” --- trying and perhaps succeeding in taking her own life, but that the things we associate with childhood --- Winnie the Pooh, and Piglet and Eeyore, all symbols of happier and more innocent times --- are forced not only to witness but to become part of and even aid in her suicide attempt. It's the ultimate perversion of childhood, that cartoon characters who have held our young hands and our young minds now become instruments of death and despair, of surrender and suicide.
”She is still young… (x4)
Another day of emptiness
This life is wearing her down
The room around her is a mess
Her children safe with her mom
She is still young but feeling old
Two children with different fathers
She sits on the bathroom floor alone
The shower chain broke, her neck hurts
Then another night of emptiness to wear her down
Naked to the world, she wraps her sadness in a gown
Her children fast asleep, she sears the dark with glassy eyes
Choosing carefully among her husband's business ties
"Over!" she cries through rope ends and silk ties
Beautiful life escaping her young blue eyes
But life holds her hand, refusing to let go
Leaving her breathing on the floor
They're still asleep, don't hear her cry
She's still obsessed with rope ends
This time she picks a stronger tie
with Winnie the Pooh and friends
She is still young but feeling old
A child dying to be a mother
Now she hangs from the ceiling all alone
All pressure is falling from her
Seeing guilt has taught her guilt, she's raised on disbelief
Merely twenty, beautiful, but with a taste for grief
She has learnt all that there is to know about hopelessness
Seeing that no effort in this world could stand her test
"Over!" she cries through rope ends and silk ties
Beautiful life escaping her young blue eyes
And Winnie is strong, would never let her fall
Prevents her from breathing till she's not there at all
But life holds her hands, refusing to let go
Leaving her breathing on the floor
Seeing guilt has taught her guilt she's raised on disbelief
Merely twenty beautiful but with a taste for grief
She has learnt all that there is to know about helplessness
Seeing that no caring in this world can ease her stress
Helpless she lies in rope ends and undies
Unseeing eyes fixating Eeyore's smile
"Over!" she cries as she's going unblind
Still in this life, still in this troubled mind
The ceiling let go, the old house let her fall
Dropping her breathing to the hard cold floor
Hitting her head - a broken china soul
Red stains on porcelain and she's not there at all
Breathing she cries for rope ends and silk ties
Beautiful eyes, Piglet stands shy behind
Broken she lies, undead and unblind
Beautiful life, beautiful crying young eyes
Blackened and bruised, learning how to see
Staring at her tooth - crimsoned ivory
Hours they pass - this broken china soul
Red stains on porcelain, and she's not there at all.”