Originally Posted by 1blankmind

I was up late at night once, and heard someone call my name out. I got up and searched the house to find my whole family sleeping and me extremely confused. So I laid down in my bed closed my eyes and heard some one walk in my room and stop and stare at me. I turned around to find no one there.

Originally Posted by Plankton

Yesterday I was sitting at my friends house on the front porch, when a couple of Bible thumpers walked up to us. One guy shook my hand and said his name and I reciprocated. He then told me that I "Looked familiar", and without batting an eye I said: "You must watch a lot of porn". He couldn't get the fuck out of their fast enough as I was calling out behind him, asking what his favorite parts were.

Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien

There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.