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Originally Posted by Chula Vista
Or if your wife of 35 years knows how to correctly settle your affairs so she's taken care of. Or not getting to know your grandchildren. Or not being able to take care of your son anymore. Or putting an extremly obsessive burden on your beautiful girlfriend you met in 1980. Or crushing your parents, sisters, and friends.
In the OP I mentioned the doctor saying "he's gone" and how it immediately crushed me. Death is not about you. It's about those you leave behind and what you meant to them from their very core and the hole you leave behind.
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I guess I'm just a narcissist. Or having never had a friend or family member I was at all close to die makes death into more of an idea than a reality. But most of my thoughts of my own death are pretty self-involved.
Quote:
Originally Posted by OccultHawk
When you get older and you start to wear down I think most people get more comfortable with it. A little different for everyone I guess. It sounds like you have a really strong survival instinct. Over time it should start to feel more right.
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Quite possibly. I might not have much going on or much hope for a better life, but for the moment the thought of listening to the next album I've been fiending for, or the next comic book that might blow my mind, or that next game of disc golf, or having lunch with my one friend in life, etc, basically makes any thought of suicide seem like robbing myself of more awesome ****, even if many people would consider those goals to be pretty shallow. Death just seems as boring as it scary tbh.