Quote:
Originally Posted by Trollheart
Yo. I don't want to keep being negative, but you need to know you're mixing your tenses. Again. One part of a sentence it's "I was" and next it's "I am", just as an example. You might want to check that. It's easy to do, I know, but re-reads usually sort it for me. Just a friendly reminder. Good stuff otherwise, and about as weird as you normally write.
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It's not negative. ****ed up tenses stand out like a sore thumb to anyone with a brain. Anything with that kind of easy **** to notice immediately feels like garbage fanfiction and invites ridicule no matter how good the story, cause we've all read that kind of poorly edited **** that simply begs to be ignored. It's that kind of **** that makes someone immediately press the Back button cause clearly the author is not competent.