Originally Posted by Lisnaholic

Oh dear, that's terrible. I wonder how old your child is? There's a legal age at which they can choose who to live with but, in my case at least, we never reached that point. My son made it so clear where he wanted to be that in the end his mum, rather in the spirit of calling his bluff, let him go...

Yes, parenting by phone is heartbreaking. The absent dad is in a no-win situation:-
i) your child is happy and answers every question with "u-huh" and "ok" so you are left frustrated and jealous
ii) your child is unhappy and you are left furious and impotent.