Quote:
Originally Posted by 66Sexy
I hide in my own world and do the least possible because that's all I can handle. I don't even know how much this is because of my family's toxic influence or how much this is because I didn't have so many of my family that my relatives did to shock me into being something I never wanted to be. I have several family members who I think legit would be better off living in that isolated island I want to live on where we got island time and no expectations on us to make us miserable. But I got family members who may or may not be the same but maybe all the blows to the face short circuited them so that they became legit successful people and the abuse was somehow ****ing better for them. Man, I don't know. I think I was definitely born in the wrong family. I wasn't meant to be exposed to so many A-type personalities.
I will never have children. Never. And if I **** up and do then I'll probably have a mental breakdown from the pressure of being nothing like my family. My best defense against this is simply to end my DNA strand.
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I don't think that's any better. You'd be more successful by standardized parameters, but you'd be ****ed in the head from the abuse and carry some of that bad stuff on with you. I can't imagine abuse actually being for the better. Even someone who was beaten and learned to "pull himself together" would be pulling himself together in a really neurotic, damaged kind of way. If abuse could breed successful people, it would be stern, buttoned up successful people who are incomplete on the inside.
You've got a lot of self-insight and you're able to loosen up and approach life with honesty and an easy going attitude. Burger King employee or not, I'd consider that a winning hand in some ways.