Neapolitan

Step 1 Pre-heat oven to 350 degrees.

Step 2 Write a note that simply says "check the oven" and place it on the bottom shelf of your refrigerator.

Step 3 Stock you refrigerator with chocolate pudding.

Step 4 Throw out all your spoons.

- it is very important you don't skip steps 1 through 4

Step 5 Invite Chula Vista over.

- Chula Vista will distract you mom with his family photos

Step 6 Invite The Batlord over, but tell him he can't use the front door. Make something up like you don't want your neighbors to call the cops.

Step 7 When he arrives you get into an argument with him in the kitchen.

Step 8 Before he shoves you into the oven, ask for one last request. Tell him to call Merit over to your house, and to tell him he has import proof that aliens really exist.

- After The Batlord shoves you in the oven. He'll the glance over and spot your refrigerator. He will commence to open the refrigerator door and a blinding light will knock him to the floor. He gets up and runs over to the silverware draw for a spoon but won't be able to find one. This will not deter him. He will proceed to refrigerator and eat all the chocolate pudding with his fingers. This will take a few hours. If he had a spoon maybe a few minutes. As he goes for the last pudding he'll see the note you place on the bottom shelf. He will remember what he did. So nonchalantly he will take you out of the oven and places you in a chair. Then he'll remember your last request then calls Merit. After the quick phone call he will go into the parlor and ask your mom if he can use the bathroom. Chula anxiously shouts out where to find it. The Bathlord goes in, locks the door. He slips out the bathroom window, still fearing your neighbors will call the cops on him.

Step 9 Merit comes over and asks for you. You mom tells him you're in the kitchen. She says she'll show him the way.

Step 10 Chula pulls on her arm and says "Wait Mrs. Oriphiel, I haven't shown you pictures of my daughter yet."

Step 11 Merit walks in the kitchen and sees you in the chair and screams "Oh noooo, Mrs. Oriphiel! Your son ... he's just been wasted by aliens with laser guns!"

Steo 12 ... there, you've been just roasted.

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