Originally Posted by OccultHawk

Went to the grocery store after work:

Cashier: You gonna eat this chicken for lunch or give it to me?
Me: You can have a piece, bro, but your fingers will get greasy.
C: What came first the chicken or the egg?
M: The Egg. The chicken evolved from something else that was also hatched in an egg.
C: How did that happen?
M: Radiation from the sun mutated the DNA.
Incredibly Cute Bagger Girl: It took a million years.
C: So if I stand in the sun will I turn into a mermaid?
M: No, you’re already a species. Nobody knows what your DNA is going to do but there’s probably not enough time left before the end of the universe for that to happen.

Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien

There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.