Quote:
Originally Posted by Marie Monday
I appreciate that, adi. When it's a process of self-discovery I would feel the same, but I can't be positive about my own case like that. I knew when I was 15 and didn't come out until I was 20. I wasn't even growing or figuring things out, I was just locked up inside my own head.
It doesn't bother me much though, I was pretty comfortable inside the closet (probably too much so) and like for you everything turned out fine in the end, that's what's important of course
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Sure, similar for me, I came out when I was 24. But in the meantime I went from thinking this is the worst thing that could have happened to me, to "accepting my lot in life" to gradually understanding there is nothing wrong with me so that by the time I was 24 I was ready to tell people because, while I was still quite worried about how they might react, I was no longer ashamed.
I imagine most gay people still go through something similar, especially coming from homophobic environments (like I did) but even more liberal ones.
So I'm thinking the time it took you to come out was obviously necessary, you were growing, even if you don't feel like you did. You weren't ready to do it at 15, and were strong enough at 20.
And sure, things might have been different, you (or I) could have been more self-assured, could have come out swinging at 12 years old ready to take on the world, and some queer people are like that. I could have also been a millionaire etc...
My point is, this is who you are, the time it took is the time it needed to take, hence why I generally don't have much regrets about anything (I guess that's a bit determinist?).