Santa Claws (2014)
Oddly enough, this ain’t on Wiki. What
is on Wiki is a 1996 horror/slasher film, which, given the content and target audience of this one, I hope nobody ever mixed up and got the wrong movie for. "Ready to settle in to see bimbos shishkebabed by a manic Santa dripping in blood boys? Hey! Where the **** did all these kittens come from??" And on the other side, “Mommy! Has that lady been naughty? Mommy! Where are all the cute little cats? Mommy I don’t like this film! I thought Santa was
good!”
See what I mean? Poles apart.
Anyhoo, this is apparently another feel-good-sit-down-with-the-kids movie about Santa getting sick and his place having to be taken by, you guessed it, a bunch of kittens. Aah! I’m sure it’s cute, if you’re a six-year old. I haven’t been six for three thousand yea- ah, for some considerable time. Oh look! Seems Glen Miller came back from the dead to direct this! Oh. Wait.
Rotten Tomatoes ratings
Tomatometer: n/a
Audience Score: 20%
IMDB rating
3.1/10
One critic persisted to the end, and had this to say:
Animal-centric holiday flick has jumbled plot, bad acting. That was Grace Montgomery at
Common Sense Media, while one audience member whined
The only film of 2014 I found myself incapable of finishing. And I watched Transformers 4!
Come on! What did you expect?
You know, they had to go for the obvious with the strapline, didn’t they? “It’s a holiday cat-astrophe!” Oh dear. Couldn’t they at least have said “Kitten out the sleigh for Christmas” or “Many paws make flight work” or yes I know, I’ll stop now.
“Hello Amazon? No, it’s not the slasher movie, it’s about kittens delivering - what do you mean, my credit card was declined??”