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Old 07-14-2006, 08:52 AM   #5 (permalink)
DontRunMeOver
They call me Tundra Boy
 
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Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: In your linen cupboard.
Posts: 1,166
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Buuuump.

I just wrote many more lyrics for this song, so please peruse and let me know your thoughts.

(In particular, do you think the last verse moves from 'guilty' to 'suicide' too quickly, how could I affect this transition more smoothly? Meaning:

"History records
A million killed
The few of those I witnessed
Haunt me still

Now I stand at the border
Calm at last
A clifftop over water
This is where I choose to pass"

Is that too abrupt a jump between topics?)
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Originally Posted by Katyppfan View Post
When Pete plays it is 100% live , your music if that's what you call it doesn't sound so good either? so you can't really critercize can you ?
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