Quote:
Woke up early this mornin,
phone ringin head bangin,
Your name flashed on the screen as images filled my mind.
the cause of the tears I cried last night.
Oh, I loved you,
but I guess that just wasn't enough.
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Phone ringing head banging? If this is going to be an actual song that will sound terrible, unless they're space apart. How about I woke up early this morning, the phone ringing my head banging?
The next part is kind of bleh, getting cheated on hurts more then a few tears and the emotion isn't just "oh my love wasn't enough" tons of things filter through your mind. The fact that they didn't love you enough, or you weren't pretty enough or perfect enough. Not just my love wasn't enough.
Quote:
Answer the phone,
determined not to care anymore,
Oh I've heard it all before.
"I'm so sorry"
"Girl it didn't meant a thing"
"it was just a kiss."
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This line just doesn't do much for me, personally if I was going to cut someone out of my life I wouldn't even have answered the phone. So I get this impression that you're clingy.
Quote:
Same lines,
different times,
not falling for it again.
THought I was differnent,
not just one of many,
guess I was wrong.
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You could go more in-depth on this, it just seems like you're lightly brushing the surface,
Quote:
Don't hear the lies falling from your lips lilke sweet poison.
No not anymore
Tears wash away all of my pain.
Done falling for you.
Made your choice,
I'm makin mine.
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Sweet poison? so overdone. Tears don't wash away pain, that lines weak. I'm done falling for you, in a song for the most part it helps if all the verses have a similar amount of syllables and actual full sentences typically are good.
I'm done falling for you,
You make your choice
And i'll make mine.
Would sound much better.
Quote:
Don't bother comin back again, I won't let you in.
Slam the dor in your face,
I'm done with the pain
I'm done with the lies,
And oh baby I'm done with your cheatin ass!
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Done with your cheating ass? Booo.
Quote:
So kiss her again,
Hold her tight,
bet you wish it was me tonight,
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Once again this could go more in-depth.
Quote:
But I'm done,
MOvin on,
Got a new man,
MIght as well dream on.
I'm not your girl anymore.
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Okay, once weak ending.
A song about infidelity could be much more powerful and emotional. This just seems like a teen ranting about a topic he/she knows nothing about and the whole thing is just bland.