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Old 02-26-2007, 03:38 AM   #297 (permalink)
sleepy jack
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Join Date: Nov 2004
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Just a suggestion for the first verse.

"Let me explain with "words" now."

Seems like to me it would just flow better.

Also maybe on the final line you should trade happy for happier? It just seems like it come across as more powerful to me at least.

Its fantastic though.
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