Both the three line stanzas are cliche and add nothing to the poem.
I'd change the first two stanzas like so:
I know what it's like.
To hurt when you smile.
When it's 82 degree humidity,
and you're freezing fucking cold,
shaking like an orgasm,
with none of the pleasure.
I know what it's like.
To step into a hot shower,
a caliber of hell,
and it feels so good to burn.
Because you think you deserve it.
Normally, fucking wouldn't go in a sentence like that, but I like how you use it and then reference orgasming right after, it works.
This is a very good poem aside from the things I mentioned.
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Quote:
Wolverinewolfweiselpigeon said:
What's with people dying? Shit.
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