1. Whats your worst feature?
Probably my drunkard gut.
2. Do you scrunch or fold your toilet paper?
Scrunch. It's the only way really.
3. What's the last sporting event you attended?
I used to make meat pies and burgers for Aberdeen FC supporters at the Pittodrie stadium on matchdays, so whatever their last home game was last season. I think it was against Rangers.
4. Describe your most embarrassing fart...
Can't really remember either.
5. What item would you steal from a friend if you knew you would get away with it?
His book of cheap-arse pasta recipes.
6. What is the answer to this question?
Absolutely.
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