You'll be fine. However wonderful you think your relationship was with this girl, it wasn't. That's why you dumped her after only a few months. a few months is really nothing. What's probably going on is that you've hit a bit of a rough patch with not working and not going to school, missing your old way of life, and latched onto the idea that by going back to her, everything will magically fix itself. It wont. You'll still be working one shift a week, still be feeling ****ty, and she still wont be old enough to drink.
Also, you said you feel bad that you destroyed her. Trust me, she's fine. She's probably very happy with the new guy and has a great life right now. Don't go messing around with her by telling her you still think about her. Give it time, you guys may or may not ever become friends like you were before, but eventually you just won't care anymore.
What you have to do is concentrate on what you can fix in your life. Maybe get another job, join a community sports league, go to night classes at the college or uni in your city, anything to make you feel like your life sucks less.
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What you've done becomes the judge of what you're going to do -- especially in other people's minds. When you're traveling, you are what you are right there and then. People don't have your past to hold against you. No yesterdays on the road.
William Least Heat Moon, Blue Highways
Your toughest competitor lives in your head. Some days his name is fear, or pain, or gravity. Stomp his ass.
HOOKED ON THE WHITE POWDER
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